100 Shots For Character Torture
by OtakuEntertainmentInc
Summary: 100 themes; 100 stories. Pairings, teams, and single characters used in abundance, along with obscene amounts of coffee. Read and review, and updates will arrive faster! Rated T for possible language and violence. Enjoy! THIRTY-TWO: HAIR
1. Introduction

_A/N: Hi there! Kiina3, here. I'm new around the site, and this is my first story. Well, I supposed you could call it 'stories.' See, what I'm planning to do is a 100-themes sort of thing, based upon the Naruto world. What can I say - I'm obsessed. Anyway, I hope you enjoy, and please, remember to review! _

**One - Introduction - Team Kurenai**

Everyone knows that when you're looking forward to something, it seems to take so much longer for it to arrive. Combine that fact with a state of chronic impatience, and the time can almost double. Especially for one Kiba Inuzuka.

"Seriously, what's taking her so long?" he said, hands shoved deep in the pockets of his jacket. "She was supposed to meet us right after the orientation - that was ten minutes ago."

Shino turned slightly to look at his new teammate. "Exactly. It's only been ten minutes, so calm down. She'll be here."

Rolling his eyes, Kiba looked around again - still no sign of their sensei. "Hey, Hinata - you're the only one of us who's actually met her - what's she like?" Barely giving the timid girl time to answer, he immediately launched into speculation. "I've never heard of her before, so she's gotta be new. Oh man, what if she's one of these 'prove her worth' types and is a total pain? Or where everything _has_ to be done according to the rules, or we get the blame for it? Or -"

"No, she's not like that at all!" Hinata burst out, unable to take it anymore. "Kurenai-sensei is a really nice person! She came to my house and talked to my father -"

"Yeah, but that's with your dad," Kiba pointed out. "What if she was only _pretending_ to be nice because he was there?"

Hinata shook her head hard. "No, she wouldn't -"

"But how do you _know_?" Kiba pressed, grinning in spite of himself. "I mean, I know you're supposed to be able to see pretty much anything with that Byakugan stuff, but you can't read minds, right?" Akamaru, zipped into the front of Kiba's jacket barked twice in agreement.

"Kiba." Shino's voice cut firmly across the noise. "Stop scaring Hinata."

There was a barely-audible rustle from behind the dog-handler. "Yes, Kiba. You really shouldn't speak like that about people behind their backs," said a new voice. The boy spun to find himself staring at his sensei; patches of red rapidly coloured his cheeks. Akamaru whimpered and ducked down out of sight.

"K-Kurenai-sensei . . . ."

One dark eyebrow arched over a dark red eye. "That's me. Now - do you have something you'd like to say to Hinata?"

Kiba dropped his gaze, knowing full well he'd been caught. "Sorry, Hinata."

"It's okay."

Kurenai nodded, apparently satisfied. "Well, now that that's out of the way - I'm your sensei, Kurenai Yūhi. I already know you, Hinata, and the boy with the big mouth is obviously Kiba . . . ." A fresh blush worked it's way onto the Inuzuka's face. " . . . . Which means that you must be Shino," she finished, looking to the last person in the little group and receiving a nod in return.

"Excellent. Now, let's see . . . . Kiba Inuzuka."

The boy jumped. "Yes, ma'am!"

"Unless you've faked your last name, you're of the Dog-User clan, correct?" The boy nodded warily. "Ah, good. Am I to take it then, that the lump inside your jacket is your dog?" As if on cue, Akamaru popped out, yapping twice before leaning forward to sniff curiously at Kurenai's proffered hand.

"Yes, ma'am. This is Akamaru."

Kurenai smiled, before turning her attention to the team in general. "Excellent. Well - with formalities out of the way, I believe it's time to get down to business." And so it was that Team 8 came together for the first time.


	2. Love

_A/N: Me again, your lovely adorable author. Well, for this themefic, I decided I didn't want to go with the typical 'love-pairing,' so I . . . 'modified' the meaning a little bit. If you think about it, what I really did was make it into 'tough love,' lol. Anyway, I hope you enjoy. (I do so love writing as Konohamaru. Kid's a frickin' A-bomb waiting to go off . . . .)_

**Two - Love - Konohamaru Ninja Squad**

"Boss!" The street rang with pounding footsteps and the loud shout. "BOOOOOSSSSSS!"

Naruto turned at the noise, Kiba looking back over his shoulder as well. "Hey, Konohamaru. What's up? Where's the fire?" The breath rushed out of him as the nine-year-old missile cannoned into his midsection.

Konohamaru adjusted the goggles on his head, not at all shaken by the collision. "It's bad, Boss. Reeeeeeaally, really bad! You gotta get somewhere safe and hide!"

Kiba frowned. "Why does he have to hide?"

A pair of wide eyes were abruptly shoved into the older boy's face. "BECAUSE THEY'RE GONNA POISON HIM!"

"Who's gonna poison me?" Naruto coughed. "Make sense, will ya?"

The youngster glanced around as though afraid of being watched, before lowering his voice. "It's not just you, Boss. It's your friend here, and all the guys you hang out with. See, I overheard the girls talking - they're gonna make a love drink and make you guys fall in love with them!"

Pulling back in shock, Kiba stared at the little informant. "They're going to do _WHAT?_"

Naruto was a bit more skeptical. "Are you for real? Where would they get the know-how to make something like that?" His eyes narrowed. "You're not lying to me, right?"

"No way, Boss, never to you!" was the earnest answer. "With all their medical training, who knows what Sakura and Ino can cook up?"

"The kid's got a point, Naruto," Kiba said nervously. "Maybe we ought to let the other guys know."

Konohamaru perked up. "Yeah, Boss! You guys go warn the others, I'll go make sure the girls don't slip the drink into anything!" With that, the miniature Sarutobi dashed off, kicking up clouds of dust.

---------

"And - and then -" Ino could barely speaking for laughing. "Ch-Chōji couldn't s-see where he was going, and - and -" She took a gasping breath. "He rolled down fifty feet of riverbank and right into the water!" More giggles erupted from the rest of the girls.

"Wow," Tenten said, wiping tears out of her eyes. "Your training sessions are even more disastrous than when Lee, Neji, and I started out." More laughter erupted from the gathering.

_Whirrrrrrrrrr-shink!_ Heads whipped around as a shuriken shot past, embedding itself in the wall. Tenten, Temari, and Sakura shot toward the window, Ino and Hinata moving to retrieve the weapon.

"Nobody there," Temari said, eyes searching for the thrower.

"There's a note attached," Hinata spoke up, unrolling a tiny scroll and reading aloud. "'We're onto your plan; you can't fool us.'"

"Let me see that," Sakura said, reaching for the note. She scanned it briefly, her eyes narrowing. "Wait a minute . . . . I know who's writing this is . . . . " She stalked back to the window. "NARUTOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"SCATTER!" Five bodies bolted off in different directions, leaving a bush directly under the window torn just enough that the girls could see Konohamaru and his two partners in crime - Moegi and Udon - crouched inside, giggling.

"Told you they'd fall for it!" the little ringleader said triumphantly. "That'll teach Naruto to not have time for us!" He looked up as someone cleared their throat overhead, his grin fading at the angry glares he received. "Uh oh . . . ."


	3. Snow

_A/N: Here we go again! I'd like to take this opportunity to give a big shoutout to my newly instated betareader - Herbblade. You know your beta is good when she can make you actually laugh out loud with her review. _

**Three - Snow - Shinamaru**

Giant drifts were piled all over the forest, snow lying on branches, hiding rocks, fallen leaves, and other woodlands miscellanea. Then again, what was one to expect in the Land of Snow?

Fleeting footsteps sent loose flakes flying as two shadows bolted across the ground. They abruptly stopped on a high branch, overlooking a wide expanse of pure white snow. Shikamaru shoved his hands back into his pockets to warm them. "Is this the place?" He was acting as support on this mission, chosen for no other reason than his specialized jutsu.

Beside him, Shino nodded once. "This is where the largest concentration of snow fleas is. Lady Tsunade needs at least half a million of them - there should be enough." His hand rose, pointing to clusters of black specks near the edge of the treeline. "There."

Shikamaru studied the little patches of bugs. "I get that she wants the bugs for something to do with medicine, but what can half a million of these things do?"

"From what I understand, the snow flea has a protein inside it that prevents it from freeing in sub-zero temperatures," Shino said tonelessly. "She wants to extract that protein and duplicate it in order to be able to store replacement organs at colder temperatures for longer."

Nodding once, the young Chūnin turned to his partner for this mission. "So how do you want to play this out?"

"I have my Insect Summoning Jutsu to attract them," Shino said. "You may want to use your Shadow Possession in order to catch them."

"Those are some pretty small targets," the other shinobi muttered. "Might as well get this over with."

The two shinobi dropped to the ground, careful to land far enough away that they wouldn't disturb their prey. Shino knelt on a patch of hard snow, placing an insect collection container on it's side in front of him. Forming a seal, he splayed the fingers of his right hand on the frozen crystals, a web of chakra spreading out. "Insect Summoning Jutsu!"

At once, myriads of tiny black snow fleas came hopping toward what was - to them - the delectable scent of human chakra., buzzing happily. Within minutes, Shino's collection container had ten bugs, then twenty. As the numbers continued to build, he nodded to Shikamaru.

Flexing his fingers to ward off cold-induced stiffness, the ponytailed boy placed them in their proper position, focusing on the hundreds of itty bitty shadows several metres away. "Shadow Possession Jutsu."

It was if the snow fleas suddenly found something even tastier than Shino's chakra. Groups of them swarmed Shikamaru's extending shadow, not stopping once they touched it. The boy in question gritted his teeth, putting more effort into capturing the tiny shadows cast by the insects, but to little avail. Only a couple dozen - possibly the weaker specimens - remained on the snow, the rest of the swarm continuing forward.

Swearing mentally, Shikamaru sprang backward from his perch on a tree root . . . only to land in a deep drift of loose powder. Sinking rapidly, he glanced down at himself, now encased to the chest in snow, then back up at the advancing snow fleas. In five seconds, they'd be on him, and he got the feeling it wasn't because they wanted to make friends.

The buzzing doubled in volume, a black cloud cutting across in front of Shikamaru. A blur of movement to his right resolved into Shino, standing to one side of the drift. "Release your jutsu," the older boy ordered.

Doing as he was bid, Shikamaru watched as the second cloud of insects - Shino's own parasitic ones, he realized - engulfed the swarm of snow fleas, utterly obliterating them in a matter of minutes.

"Thanks," he said, once the bugs dispersed, returning to their commander. "I owe you one."

Shino was silent, apparently studying him. "Perhaps I should collect the rest of the insects on my own."

"Yeah. Good idea."


	4. Dark

_A/N: Another thank you to my dear Herbblade, without whom these stories would remain likely inedited. And now, to start a tradition that shall carry on - the naming of the time when each themefic takes place._

_Chronology: Between the Land of Waves and Chūnin exam arcs._

**Four - Dark - Inosasunata **

_Just shoot me._

Never before in his life had Sasuke had that thought as many times in one day. And yet, ever since they'd left Konohagakure on this mission, it had repeated itself every time Ino tried to talk to him, or Hinata screwed up the courage to ask something about Naruto.

Somehow, the Hokage had gotten it into her blonde head that temporarily switching up the nine rookies and Gai's team would be a good 'character-building and teamwork' exercise. And so, he'd wound up with the two girls, on their way to the mountains, to find some sort of medicinal fungus for the Hokage's stock. This, explicably, had brought them to the mouth of a cave on the side of a mountain, just below the snowline.

"Wait a minute," Ino said. Nervousness was evident in her voice. "How . . . how do we even know this is the right cave?"

"Because there's supposed to be a sign to the right of the entrance," Sasuke answered as he started forward. He jerked his chin at words carved into the rock. "That's the sign. Let's go."

Taking a flare stick from his pouch for light, he led the way, both girls following more than a little reluctantly. Once the cave entrance disappeared, they began to get even more skittish.

Hinata paused, looking around. "Did - did you hear that?"

The trio stopped, straining their ears for any hint of sound. "It's just your imagination," Sasuke said at last. "Come on - keep moving."

Thirty seconds later, Ino screamed, the sounds reverberating off the walls to echo around them. She swatted frantically at her arms and hair, brushing at the things that had landed on her. "SPIDERS! GET THEM OFF! GET THEM OFF!"

Sasuke frowned - something wasn't right. Spiders couldn't survive this deep in a cave . . . . "Release!" Instantly, the spiders were no longer visible, at least not to him. Hinata seemed to have caught on as well and freed herself from the genjutsu. Performing the release again, her hand shot out, touching Ino on the forehead, and the blonde ninja froze in mid-shriek.

"Sorry," she muttered, blushing furiously.

Turning, Sasuke led them deeper into the mountainside, until finally, they came upon a veritable carpet of pale purple fungus. They stopped at the edge, looking over the miniature field. Over twenty metres wide, it ended in a pockmarked wall that heralded the back of the cave. "Looks like this is it," he said, setting the flare stick down where it would illuminate their work. "Let's get to it."

Hinata was looking around again, tapping her index fingers together nervously. "There's something wrong again. Maybe another genjutsu . . . ."

A loud, guttural roar sounded from a dark recess to one side of the fungus mat. The three genin stopped in their tracks, but the sound wasn't repeated.

"L-let's just get what we came for and get out of here," Ino said, her voice little more than a whisper. "I'm really starting to get creeped out." For once, Sasuke didn't disagree with her.

They'd gathered several containers of fungus when Hinata accidentally dropped the kunai she was using to scrape the stuff off the floor. The loud roar rang out at the sound of metal on stone, and this time, movement accompanied it. From every little pockmark crater on the back wall burst at least a dozen bats.

Ducking out of the way of the flying rodents, the little group found themselves facing a quartet of giant clawed feet. Two of them left the ground as the bear rose to its full height, roaring its displeasure at having been disturbed.

"S-S-S-S-Sasuke?" Ino whimpered. "I don't think this is a genjutsu."

Once again, he had to admit that she was right. Unfortunately.


	5. Comfort

_A/N: This is liable to be a little out of character - Herbblade said it's okay BUT I LIKE DOUBTING MYSELF DON'T JUDGE ME. Oh well - sometimes characters are downright hilarious when they're OOC. Go read, now. And don't forget to review - I'll know if you don't . . . . [insert creepy exit here]_

**Five - Comfort - SaiLee**

It felt like . . . well, he wasn't quite sure what it felt like. Lying on his back in the hospital bed, Sai had had plenty of time to consider the sensation roiling in his stomach. Sometimes, it felt like lava at the centre of the sun, and others - when the medication was in effect - it was something like a dozen ice cubes in liquid nitrogen.

He'd been lucky, he knew. Incredibly lucky. He'd been sitting in a quiet corner of a teashop, studying a dossier Root had given him that morning. One minute, he was taking a drink from the cup of tea at his elbow, and the next, he was doubled-over, his mouth on fire, pain shooting down his throat, and struggling to breathe. Seconds later, he had gagged, the only thing emerging from his mouth a thin line of blood. A bystander had rushed him to the hospital.

The dossier he'd been reading was gone, snatched by the same person who'd put the lye in his tea - likely the server, working undercover for Root's enemies. Pure nutrients were being slowly dripped into his bloodstream via an IV - his stomach had several ulcers from the lye and couldn't handle food of any kind, and according to the doctors, he would remain that way for the rest of his life - there was simply too much damage to the stomach and it's connections to the chakra network for the organ to heal.

All in all, it was very depressing. There was no way Root would take him back as an operative, after having been poisoned so easily. In their eyes, he was practically worthless now.

There was a quiet knock at the door, causing Sai's head to turn. "Yes?" he rasped, the burns to his esophagus preventing his vocal chords from functioning as normal.

Sliding open, the door revealed a boy not much younger than himself, wearing what appeared to be a seamless, green catsuit, belted by a red Leaf headband, with vivid orange leg-warmers over the traditional sandals. "You are Sai, am I right?"

". . . . Yes," he said carefully, not sure how to react to the stranger.

"Excellent. You are just the one I have been looking for." Closing the door, the strange boy crossed to the room's only visitor's chair, sitting down. "I am here at the request of our Hokage, Lady Tsunade. She said that you are facing a serious problem in your career as a Leaf shinobi."

Folding his hands lightly on top of the blanket, Sai studied the newcomer. "What does that have to do with you being here? And who are you?"

"My name is Rock Lee!" was the over-energetic answer. "I was sent because two and a half years ago, I was in your position. I had been injured, and I was told that because of that, I would no longer be able to fulfill my dream - to become the best ninja I can be using only taijutsu!"

"And so the Hokage thought that you would be able to sympathize with me and cheer me up," Sai answered. He remembered hearing about the medically-inclined Hokage performing an extremely delicate procedure on a gravely-injured genin. Perhaps this was that same person?

"However!" Lee exclaimed, ignoring him. "Lady Tsunade was able to heal me, and I am confident that she can do the same for you!" Sticking his left arm straight out, he gave an exaggerated thumbs-up gesture, grinning in what he no doubt thought was a 'roguish' manner.

"Really," Sai said, with his usual emotionless tone. "And how might she do that." He watched as Lee's exuberant facial expression fell into one of contemplation and consternation. "Exactly as I thought - you don't know."

"I admit that I do not know, but I am not a medical ninja," Lee said firmly. "The Hokage has access to extensive medical knowledge and is a very skilled doctor. If there is a way to help you, she will find it. And if not -" He made a decisive fist. "Then I will do all I can to find a cure for you, even if it costs me my life!" Again, he made the over-enthusiastic thumbs-up gesture, complete with cheesy grin.

Sai mentally shook his head. He was in for the duration - Lee had a captive audience, and he knew it. "Perhaps," he said after a moment, "you're right." He offered a 'smile.' "Thank you."


	6. Tracking

_A/N: Sorry it's been so long - school has been murder on my writing, both in terms of getting things done and causing a slump. That's the effect newswriting has on creativity, I suppose. Thanks to Herbblade for her awesome-as-always betareading, and to you, for taking the time to read! _

**Six - Tracking - Sakiba**

For being both the Fifth Hokage and a highly-trained medical ninja, Lady Tsunade could sometimes act as irresponsibly as a teenager, Sakura mused, walking along the street. In her hand was a piece of dark cloth and ahead on her left was the Inuzuka house.

Kiba answered the door at her knock. "Sakura? What're you doing here? Did something happen with Naruto?"

"No, nothing like that," she answered. "I just need some help from you and Akamaru."

Stepping outside, the white puppy at his heels, Kiba shut the door before putting both hands in his pockets. "Sure thing. What's up?"

"Lady Tsunade was working late at home last night, studying the Nara clan's medical journal," Sakura explained. "Judging from her behaviour this morning, though, she had more than a little sip of sake too. She fell asleep at her desk, and when she woke up, the journal was gone." Holding up the piece of cloth, she continued. "The only thing the thief left was this - it got torn off against a splinter in the desk."

Taking the fabric scrap, Kiba grinned. "I get it - you want me and Akamaru to sniff the thief out for you." At Sakura's nod, he gave the cloth an experimental whiff. "The smell's familiar - I can't quite place it, though." Crouching, he proffered the thing to his companion. "What do you think, boy?"

Sniffing gingerly, Akamaru barked before sprinting for the gate. Pausing to look back at the two humans, he trotted onward; back the way Sakura had come.

"We'll need to start from the Hokage's house," Kiba explained as they followed behind the little dog. "That's where the trail starts - we'll be able to follow it anywhere once Akamaru gets the scent."

------

Twenty minutes later, they were on the main street, still following Akamaru, who had his nose to the ground, sniffing hard in concentration. People were careful not to step on the little fellow, smiling at him as he passed. Sakura and Kiba trailed close behind.

Abruptly, Akamaru lifted his head, looking up at the entrance to a food shop. Turning to his master, he barked twice in excitement.

"The trail leads inside," Kiba translated, quickening the pace. Like a furry guided missile, Akamaru led the two of them into the shop, to the very feet of their target.

Sakura frowned slightly in puzzlement. "Shizune?

The older woman turned at the sound of her name, smiling when she saw who was addressing her. "Good morning Sakura; Kiba." She smiled at the dog at her feet. "And to you too, Akamaru."

The two genin traded glances before Sakura spoke up again. "Shizune, do you recognize this?" She held up the scrap of dark cloth - cloth of a colour and texture the same as Shizune's robe.

"Yes - I tore my sleeve this morning, when I picked up the Nara clan's medical journal." She lifted one arm, showing the torn fabric in confirmation. "We've had the journal since Rock Lee's surgery - it was high time we returned it." Frowning, Shizune looked between the two of them. "Why do you ask?"

Listening as Sakura told her the story, Shizune couldn't help but shake her head in exasperation. "Lady Tsunade has been under more stress than usual lately," she said, once the young medical apprentice had finished. "I'll go explain everything to her, once I finish getting the ingredients for her hangover cure."

Sakura nodded, smiling in relief - at least she wouldn't have to face Tsunade again until she was feeling better. "All right - thank you."

. . . . .

_Reviews are always welcome! I want to know what thoughts are going through that lovely mind of yours!_


	7. Heaven

**Seven - Heaven - Tenten**

Trapped by both an immobilization jutsu and a muscular arm across her collarbone, she glared at the man standing in front of her - an accomplice to the one holding her in place. A super-keen kunai pressed lightly against her throat, the slightest pressure drawing a thin trickle of blood. All Tenten had done was come early for Team Gai's scheduled training; she was beginning to regret that decision.

"I'll ask again," the man behind her growled, his breath tickling her ear. "Where is Neji Hyūga?" Tenten clamped her mouth shut, determined not to tell. After several seconds of silence, the man looked to his accomplice and nodded.

Smacking a fist into the opposite palm, the tall, burly intruder started forward, a nasty gleam in his eyes. "Heh heh. You're going to wish you'd talked, girl. Now we'll just have to beat an answer out of you."

Tenten began trying to break free of the immobilization jutsu - whatever these men wanted with Neji, it wasn't likely to be good. If she could get loose, she'd have to take out the one behind her first, then get him between herself and the other . . . . Things did _not_ look good.

Just as the burly intruder drew back his arm for the first blow, a green blur hurtled out of nowhere, striking him from the side and knocking him to the ground. The man holding Tenten shuddered, giving a pained grunt, before dropping limply to the grass. The jutsu dissolved, freeing her - looking over her shoulder, she saw Neji warily approaching his target, alert for signs of retaliation. Lee stood over the other man, almost daring him to get up again.

"Thanks, guys," Tenten said, hiding her disappointment - she'd wanted to pound the two herself.

"I may have hit him harder than I intended," Neji said, his voice a monotone. He was crouched beside the intruder, two fingers at the other man's throat, checking for a pulse. Looking up at Tenten, he stiffened.

She frowned. "What?" Feeling a stinging sensation on her neck, she reached up, touching the spot. Her fingers came away covered in blood - much more than there should have been. S***, the cut from earlier. The world began to rock, prompting her to sink to the ground, reaching back up to press down on the cut. She was still pressing when everything went black.

-----

It was so bright - brighter than a candle flame, brighter than snow on a sunny day, brighter than the sun itself. Some strange part of Tenten's mind told her that she should be squinting at the light all around her, yet she was able to look at it comfortably. Pearly mist swirled around her, augmenting the brightness. Either it was moving past her, or she was floating past it; she didn't care. All she knew was that she had to follow it.

Abruptly, out of the mist rose a shining golden gate, guarded by a dark shadowy being. Pausing only for an instant, Tenten moved toward it. "Hello?"

The being turned . . . and she froze. It was the man who Neji had killed on the training field. For him to be here, in the same place she was . . . implied she was dead too.

"They won't let me in," the man said, leering at her. "They say I've done too many bad things." Slowly, he drew a kunai from his belt as he spoke. "If I can't get in anyway . . . what's one more bad thing going to hurt?"

Lunging forward, he stabbed down at Tenten, who dodged at the last minute. The kunai stabbed into the whiteness underneath her feet, opening up a dark hole. The whiteness continued to crumble, the hole expanding. Her attacker scrambled back, but Tenten wasn't quick enough. Plunging down into the darkness, she watched the whiteness disappear . . . .

-----

A machine next to the bed beeped in sync with each beat of her heart - she was in the hospital. Neji and Lee were asleep on the two visitors' chairs, she noted absently. Raising a hand to her neck, Tenten gingerly touched the bandage there, staring up at the ceiling.

The white walls seemed off-white now, in comparison. She'd seen the gates of Heaven . . . and she'd come back home.


	8. Innocence

**Eight - Innocence - Team Seven**

The three of them stood in front of the Hokage's desk, watching as she scrutinized each of them. Each had a different reaction - Sakura's gaze diverted to the floor, Naruto kept shifting from one foot to the other, and Sasuke maintained an expression of boredom.

At last, Tsunade spoke. "Do any of you know why you're here?" No answer. Lifting her eyes to the office door, she called, "Madam Shijimi?"

A large woman entered - one who the team recognized easily by the aggrieved-looking cat dangling from her clutches. Beady eyes watched them all with something akin to a plea for help.

"Are these the ones?" Madam Shijimi demanded, her eyes - heavy with make-up - darting from one Genin to the next. "Are these the miscreants that attacked me and tried to take my darling Tora?"

Tsunade cleared her throat to gain the other woman's attention. "Pardon me, but didn't you say that only one person came after your cat?"

"So I did, so I did," the cat-lady mused, absently stroking her pet on the head. Every time her meaty hand came down, it merely served to bop poor Tora on the head.

"Naruto, do you know anything about this?" Tsunade asked, her voice firm.

"No," the blonde boy scowled. "Why would I want to jump some lady and her cat?"

"She's not just 'some lady,'" Sakura hissed at him. "She's the wife of the Fire Daimyo!" She glanced nervously at Tsunade - now the Hokage was looking at her.

"What about you, Sakura?" The voice was calm, though not in a comforting way. Tsunade was a coiled spring - the instant guilt was expressed, the perpetrator was going to find themselves in for a world of hurt.

"N-no, ma'am," the girl said quickly. Almost too quickly. She forced herself not to fidget and to meet the other's gaze - she would _not_ be labelled as guilty.

Tsunade's eyes turned toward Sasuke; she seemed to pause. "I don't suppose I really have to ask if it was you."

He moved one shoulder in a half-shrug. "Naruto already said it - why would I want to take her cat?"

Leaning back in her chair, Tsunade sighed. "All right then - the three of you can leave. Madam Shijimi, is there anything else you can tell me about the person who tried to take Tora?" The office door closed, cutting off any further dialogue as Team Seven left.

Reaching the foot of the stairs at ground level, Sasuke stopped, turning to face Sakura. "So. Why did you lie?"

"Didn't you see the look on that poor cat's face?" she said, pointing back the way they'd come. "He runs away all the time, and no wonder, the way she treats him. She lugs him around like a sack of potatoes!"

Naruto glanced between the two of them. "What the heck are you guys talking about?"

"Moron - don't tell me you didn't clue in back there. Sakura was the one who tried to take the cat."

"Only because what she's doing is practically animal cruelty!" Sakura said defensively. "I felt bad enough when it was our mission to catch him - I couldn't just sit there and do _nothing_."

"Well, any stunt you can get away with is a good one by me!" Naruto broke in, grinning. "And way to go for pulling one over on Grandma Tsunade!"

Sakura sighed inwardly. Trust Naruto to condone lying to the Hokage.


	9. Drive

**Nine - Drive - Sand Siblings**

A light wind blew across the sand, pulling little grains of grit along with it. More of the stuff was flung into the air as a wooden device slid across the rolling dunes. Smooth, flat boards with a rounded front end alternated forward strokes in time with the movements of the person controlling them.

Glancing back over his shoulder, Kankuro grinned at his siblings. "What do you think? Pretty cool, huh?" Chakra strings ran from his fingertips to control levers for the sand-sled's runners; so long as he moved them, the contraption would move as well.

Temari shook her head, smiling to herself. "Only you would try and build something like this," she commented. "But I have to admit, it's pretty clever."

"Thanks." Turning his attention to the vast desert around them, Kankuro frowned, slowing the sand-sled.

Gaara's head came up, pale eyes studying his older brother. "What is it?"

"Dust cloud off to the right," the puppeteer answered. "This far out, it can't be anything good." Starting the control levers moving again, he sent the sand-sled skimming off over the desert, away from the cloud of dust. Whether it was a sandstorm, nomads, or bandits, it was to be avoided.

"Kankuro? It's gaining on us," Temari said, watching the cloud carefully.

Getting wordlessly to his feet, Gaara stood still, concentrating. The sand beneath began to move in time with the sled's runners, pushing the transport on to greater speeds. But still the dust cloud kept coming.

Figures were visible at the front of it now - people dressed from head to toe in dark, flowing robes, several of them using a wind release jutsu to fill a sail on board their own sand-sled. Those with free hands clutched wicked-looking sickle-shaped swords.

"Well, how do you like that," Kankuro muttered. "You come up with something new, and right away you've got imitators."

"Kankuro."

Looking across to Gaara, Kankuro followed his younger brother's pointing finger to a spot on the horizon where the land abruptly dropped away. A grin spread across his face. "Temari, get ready - you're going to have to move fast."

Looking ahead as well, Temari nodded once. "Right." Loosing her fan from its place on her back, she braced both feet on the sand-sled's deck, waiting. Second by second - with their pursuers still gaining - they drew closer to their target. A pair cliffs became evident, with both transports heading directly for the edge.

As they shot out into open space, Temari made her move. "Summoning Jutsu!" With an audible 'poof!,' a pure white weasel appeared, waiting just long enough for the three of them to catch hold before it took off so fast, it practically disappeared.

The pursuer's sand-sled came over the edge of the cliff above them screams echoing against the reddish sandstone as it plunged down, down, _down_ to a sandy crash below.

Kamatari - the weasel summoned by Temari - scaled rapidly down the cliff side, the three siblings clutching it by its scrubby fur. Reaching the base of the cliff, they slipped off, landing on their feet and moving toward the pursuers' shattered sand-sled.

Groaning, the strangers were beginning to collect themselves, but froze when the shadows of their would-be victims loomed over them.

"Well, well," Gaara said emotionlessly. He folded his arms as the man directly in front of him looked up. "What have we here?"


	10. Breathe Again

Ten - Breathe Again - Saino

"It was really nice of you to invite me for training," Ino said conversationally, trailing along beside Sai. She'd been only too happy to accept the offer - anything to get out of the shop on a beautiful day like this.

"Training by yourself can only take you so far," he answered as they emerged onto the open practice field. "Occasionally, it's good to have someone else to work with." He cast her a sidelong glance. "And if I'm right, you haven't had much time for training lately, have you."

Ino nodded. "Between my medical ninjustu lessons and working at the flower shop, there's almost no time to myself anymore. And with Shikamaru and Chōji off on their own missions, training with them is pretty much impossible."

"As long as you do what you can, when you can," Sai said diplomatically, "you should be able to retain your skills fairly well."

"Only one way to find out, isn't there." A kunai suddenly in hand, she slashed sideways at him; a blow which he easily dodged, leaping out of her range. .

Range . . . . no. Ino was a long-range fighter, he remembered. That little attack had been nothing more than a distance-maker. Now all he had to do was avoid her jutsu, and get in close enough to neutralize her. Simple.

He watched the thumbs and forefingers of her hands form a rectangle before taking three quick leaps back into the tree line. Dodging behind a thick trunk - and out of her line of sight - he shot upward before setting off around the edge of the field. As long as he was behind her and unnoticed, she wouldn't be able to target him.

Dropping to the ground almost directly behind her, drawing his Tantō the second his sandals touched dirt, Sai took a half-step forward, bringing the weapon around, aiming for the small of her back.

At the last second, Ino turned aside. Her left hand swept across, catching the Tantō across the flat of the blade and knocking it aside. At the same time, her right hand shot forward, directly into his solar plexus. The force of the blow knocked him back two steps before he overbalanced and fell.

"Ha! Thought you could sneak up on me, did you?" Ino said, smiling triumphantly.

Sai tried to answer - air refused to enter or leave his body. He coughed, forcing air out, struggling to inhale. Only a trickle of oxygen was admitted.

Ino's eyes widened. "Oh no . . . . " Dropping to her knees beside him, she touched three fingers to his chest, a pale green aura surrounding them. After several seconds, she nodded. "It's all right - there's no permanent damage; just stay calm, and you'll be able to breathe normally in a couple minutes. Here - "

Placing her hands on his shoulders, she gently pushed him flat on the ground. "Stretch out as much as you can - your diaphragm is spasming, and preventing you from breathing properly." Obediently, Sai lifted both arms over his head, feeling oxygen start to flow more freely . . . just as another sensation made itself felt.

"Pain," he choked out, still not quite able to speak naturally. "Right side."

Ino touched the spot, her lips pressing together briefly. "There's a small fracture in one of your ribs - I must've missed it. Hold still . . . ."

The pain eased as she worked, and by the time her hands finally dropped away, Sai could breathe again, with only a small ache in his side. Sitting up carefully, he inhaled deeply.

"Perhaps we should end it there for today," he said, giving a small 'smile.' "You seem to have proven that while you might not train as much, your skills haven't deteriorated."

Ino smiled back. "Yeah . . . . I'm sorry about what happened. If you want, we can come back tomorrow - it's only fair that you get a chance to try and take _my _breath away."


	11. Memory

_A/N: Hi there! I just realized I've never given a disclaimer, and haven't publicly thanked my betareader in weeks. I'm a terrible, terrible person, lol. So. I don't own Naruto. At all. And a giant, overdue thank you to Herbblade for being my awesome betareader. Today's shot came to me while I was watching the fight between Team Gai and Kisame. If you'll remember, poor little Fishface slipped Gai's memory; I just took that and ran with it. Enjoy!_

Eleven - Memory - Team Gai

Sounds of training echoed from the grassy field, mostly the thuds and thumps of taijutsu. However, another sound was clearly audible.

"GO, LEE! GO GO GO!"

At his sensei's encouragement, the boy pursued his teammate across the field, launching blow after blow, which she blocked, a kunai in one hand that she used for retaliation. A third student stood nearby, following the sparring with watchful, pearl-gray eyes.

Finally, Lee lashed out with a hard kick, catching his opponent in the stomach and sending her flying backwards. She hit the ground hard, raising one hand to signal defeat.

"Excellent job, Lee!" Gai beamed, flashing his trademark thumbs-up-and-smile. "And you too . . . er . . . ." He paused, watching as the girl got to her feet. "What's your name again?"

She sighed. "My name's Tenten, Gai-sensei."

"Right! You did a good job too!"

"It's been two weeks since our team was formed," Neji said, moving forward to join the trio. "Shouldn't you have learned her name by now?"

Gai waved a hand airily. "Don't be ridiculous, I know exactly what her name is! It's -" He froze, one finger raised and mouth open. For several seconds, he remained that way, before squinting across at his female student. "Mmm . . . her name is . . . ."

"My point exactly," Neji said, smirking in satisfaction.

"Gai-sensei!" Lee's hand shot into the air, waving frantically for attention. "Why is it that you can remember my name and Neji's, and yet you forget Tenten's?"

"Well, it's funny you should ask that, Lee," the tall Jōnin said. "While I may have many skills - taijutsu, ninjutsu, the ability to look handsome in almost any situation - I have a rather selective memory."

"What?!" Tenten burst out. Her hand tightened on the kunai, knuckles turning white. "You're telling me that my name just slipped through the cracks?"

"Exactly! You see, both Lee and Neji have something that defines them: Lee has his incredible good looks - he remind me of someone, but I can't think who -, and Neji is a genius. That helps me remember who they are." Patting Tenten on the head, Gai smiled. "Don't worry, we'll find something for you to be remembered by!"

_Thwack!_

Gai hit the dirt, Tenten standing over him. "Well, let's get you started on learning my name," she said calmly. "My. Name. Is. Tenten."

"Your name is Tenten." Gai repeated, warily watching the kunai in the girl's hand.

"Again."

"Your name is Tenten."

Standing off to the side, both boys watched as their teammate made Gai repeat her name over and over again. Lee leaned closer to Neji, whispering, "Do you think she could be remembered for this?"

The young Hyūga nodded. "She's going to be a tough one to forget by the time she's done."


	12. Insanity

_A/N: Goooood morning, readers! . . . Well, I don't know what time it is for you, but it's morning here, lol. Thanks much to my lovely betareader, Herbblade! And I realize this theme might be a little tricky to tie to the story, but it IS in there. Enjoy!_

_PS - I am now accepting suggestions for a new title, lol. "Variations on a Naruto Theme" just isn't . . . catchy, I don't think. I value your opinion! =D_

* * *

Twelve - Insanity - Kibenai

Kiba was crouched in a stand of small bushes, eyes darting in all directions as he searched for any sign that he'd been spotted by his enemy. He and Akamaru had had to split up earlier; hopefully the little guy was all right. Without Akamaru, his number of options was cut almost in half. It was like he was being backed into a corner . . . and Kiba _hated_ being cornered.

"Do you actually think you can hide from me?" a voice called out, mocking him. "You're sitting there like a scared little puppy without it's mother."

Gritting his teeth - similarly clamping down on his anger - Kiba drew two shuriken, holding them ready. If he could just pinpoint where the voice was coming from . . . . He sniffed carefully, hoping the breeze would give him some clue . . . there.

Lunging out of cover, he spun, hurling the shuriken at his target. "How's this for a scared little puppy, huh?" The two projectiles went true, thudding into Kurenai's side. She disappeared milliseconds later in a cloud of white smoke. Kiba skidded to a stop.

"Dang it . . . shadow clone . . . ."

From off to his left, Kurenai emerged, calmly brushing dried leaves from her clothes. "That was a good shot." She gave a small smirk. "But not quite good enough."

Kiba dropped into a combat stance. "Whatever - it's your move."

"Very well." The leaves his sensei had brushed off stirred on the ground. Several flipped over and rose in the air . . . changing. Green turned to steel gray as the little points at the tip elongated into something much more deadly than little pieces of foliage.

With a wave of her hand, Kurenai sent her new kunai flying right toward him. Kiba crouched low to the ground and sprang aside, sprinting an extra couple of steps just to be sure he was safe. Turning his head, his eyes widened. _What?!_ Bursting into motion, he dodged upward into the tree branches, pursued by the leaves-turned-weapons.

"You can run," Kurenai's voice mocked, "but you can't hide."

Kiba poured on speed - he couldn't lose now. It was a matter of pride. Bounding from branch to branch, he kept glancing behind - the kunai still followed.

When his foot came down on the next limb, it didn't offer any resistance. In fact, it didn't even seem to be there. He plummeted straight down, tensing in anticipation of the hard impact.

It never came. Kiba fell into blackness, punctuated with eye-smarting streaks of red, yellow, orange, green, and several colours he didn't know existed.

"What the -"

Voices assailed him from every side, some not much more than whispers, other so loud that he had to cover his ears. Still, he was unable to shut them out. Squeezing his eyes shut against the bright colours, he tried to focus. This had to be a genjutsu . . . .

"Release!"

Opening his eyes, Kiba found himself flat on his back in the bushes, staring at the leaves above him. His breath came out in a rush, cold sweat covering him from head to toe. "Should've known better," he muttered, sitting up.

Quiet rustling came from beside him, Akamaru appearing from between the twigs and sticks. Whining softly, he looked up at his master, head cocked questioningly to one side.

Kiba smiled, patting his little friend on the head. "I'm all right, boy, don't worry." Moving into a crouch, he grinned. "What do you think - you up for another try?"


	13. Misfortune

_A/N: Hey there, everyone! Wow, 99 hits for the last post, that's great! I think that's some kind of record. Just remember: I want your reviews too! It only has to be a few words, and they make me feel loved. =) I know my last couple shots have been kind of for-srs (aka 'serious'), but this one's a little more light-hearted. Hope you enjoy!_

Thirteen - Misfortune - Tsuzune

Footsteps pounded down the narrow alleyway, the two women having to move double-time in order to stay ahead of their pursuers. The younger female, dark hair framing an innocent-looking face, stumbled, nearly dropping the small pig she carried. Her companion - tall and chesty with blonde hair - caught her by the arm, tugging her along.

"Come on, Shizune, move!"

"Y-yes, Lady Tsunade . . . ."

"GET BACK HERE WITH OUR MONEY!" yelled the group of men following them. There were some fairly nasty-looking ones in the group, the hilts of weapons protruding from waist sashes. All had the look of low-life thugs and the dregs of society.

Tsunade looked back, her face calm, even a little amused. "Shizune? How much do we owe them exactly?"

"The last tally was 8500 ryō, I think." Adjusting her grip on Ton Ton - the small pig - Shizune cast a sidelong glance at her mistress. "Lady Tsunade, maybe we ought to just stop, go back to the gambling hall and pay off the debt?"

That drew a laugh from the older woman. "Oh, come on, you know as well as I do that I don't have that much money." She smiled easily. "We'll get rid of these losers, go someplace else, work up enough to pay them off, and then come back."

Shizune sighed quietly. "Whatever you say, Lady Tsunade . . . ." The two of them skidded to a stop at a T-intersection, looking left and right. The men chasing them had fallen behind and out of sight, although their shouts still echoed off the walls of nearby buildings. Shizune panted, trying to catch her breath. "Which way do we go?"

Tsunade, looking off to the right, stiffened. "Not that way!" A new group of pursuers had appeared around the far corner, and was now rushing toward them, waving arms and weapons.

"This way's no good either!" Shizune pointed to a second new group approaching from the left. She looked back in time to see the original crowd come around a corner. "Oh no . . . ." With opponents on three sides and a wall on the fourth, they were effectively boxed in.

"Well. Only one way left to go, isn't there?" Tsunade said, almost happily. "Let's go, Shizune."

The two of them shot up and forward, onto the top of the wall in front. Tsunade half-turned to the followers, waving cheekily. "Sorry, fellas - maybe next time." With that, she jumped down on the other side and bolted off, Shizune hot on her heels.

"Another successful getaway," Tsunade said, sounding satisfied.

"I thought you said we weren't going to make a habit of them," her companion said in disapproval. "That was twenty-nine getaways ago."

"Hey, you're the one who decided to come with me."

They were forced to suddenly stop again as a tall, charismatic-looking man stepped into the road ahead. Tsunade came to a halt a bare metre away from him. Shizune, able to stop a little sooner, swallowed nervously - he was the owner of the gambling hall they'd just fled.

"Ah, Lady Tsunade, a pleasure to see you again," he said smoothly, a cultured smile curving the corner of his mouth. "I'm not sure if you were aware, but you seem to have left my establishment without settling some rather outstanding debts. My associates attempted to follow you, but they appear to have missed you."

Tsunade smiled, although not as confidently this time. "Oh, was that them? I'm sorry, I mistook them for thieves that were trying to steal what money I do have."

From the moment they'd left the gambling hall, Shizune'd known the losing streak wasn't quite over . . . .


	14. Smile

_A/N: I love this one - writing Itachi is way more fun than I originally thought. ^^ Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy it, and please - do review. That little button at the bottom feels so lonely, and I don't feel near as warm and fuzzy if you don't! Shoutout to Herbblade, my awesome betareader. Kudos for all the top-notch work she does!_

Fourteen - Smile - Sasoritachi

The forest clearing was the perfect picture of peacefulness. Green grass, sun-dappled shadow cast by a thick canopy overhead, a light breeze moving through the trees. The only thing to mar the scene was the two shinobi facing each other, each seemingly relaxed yet more tense than a spring would too tightly.

"It's been a while since you and I met like this, Itachi," Sasori commented, his voice sounding deep and gravelly from inside the protective shell Hiruko afforded. "I trust you haven't fallen out of practice?"

"A shame if I have," the other commented. "Else our little session today would be a waste of time."

"Agreed." Bracing his hands against the soft grass, Sasori readied himself. "Then let's begin, shall we?" Without waiting for a reply, he sent the poison-tipped tail hurtling through the air toward his opponent.

A black blur shot up and to the left from where Itachi had been, coming to a halt on a branch several metres above the ground. "Hn. Predictable." Hands moving quickly, he set two fingers against his chin, inhaling deeply. On the exhale, a steady stream of fire came whooshing out, heading directly for Sasori, expanding as it came.

Dodging aside, the puppetmaster laughed hollowly, the sound ominous. "You'll have to be quicker than that. Where's that legendary speed of yours?"

Hiruko's left arm extended forward, the projectiles around its wrist flying out toward Itachi. A split-second later, the wooden carriers split open, disgorging their cargoes of deadly senbon. The thin needles sliced into the younger man's body and through his cloak; as if in slow motion, he fell backward off the branch on which he stood.

When the body was only metres from the ground, it disappeared in a billow of smoke, and a needle-pierced log thudded onto the grass. Sasori was already on the lookout; Itachi was simply too good to be taken out by a simple senbon attack. He must've used a substitution jutsu while Sasori was still occupied with dodging the fire attack.

"Clever, as usual."

"I'm flattered." The voice came from behind him; Sasori turned, but Itachi was nowhere in sight. "However, it will get you nowhere."

A lone crow launched itself like a feathered kunai from the dense foliage of a nearby tree, zeroing in on Hiruko's left eye. The tail whipped around in defense, the bird's beak making a loud _ping!_ as it glanced off the metal. Seconds later, the long appendage had wrapped around the crow's body. A tight squeeze and an audible _crack_ later, the creature went limp.

Dropping the lifeless thing, Sasori chuckled again. "Child's play," he said dismissively as Itachi stepped into view from behind a large, jagged rock. The puppetmaster was careful not to look directly at Itachi's face - he knew from listening to Deidara what could happen if he did.

"Then perhaps I should stop playing." Itachi's right hand rose, finger pointing at his opponent. "Be ready, Sasori."

Preparing for an attack, Sasori watched, but Itachi merely lowered his hand again and remained still. He could tell the younger man was watching him intently - perhaps waiting for him to make the first move? Very well.

Reaching up to remove Hiruko's facemask, Sasori paused as something scuttled across the puppet's hand. A brilliantly red scorpion stood poised on the projectile gauntlet. It was joined by another . . . and another . . . . Scuttling noises sounded across the puppet's back, tail, legs . . . . The little arachnids were everywhere. Sasori flinched as one climbed slowly onto his foot, beginning it's ascent toward his heart . . . .

Itachi watched as Hiruko shuddered violently from the actions of its master within. How unfortunate - Deidara must have neglected to mention Itachi's ability to cast a genjutsu without making eye contact. And now Sasori was paying for it with visions of deadly fire scorpions . . . . Most unfortunate.

He allowed his eyes to revert from the Sharingan to their natural dark gray. Behind the high collar of his cloak, one corner of Itachi's mouth curled upward in a smirk.


	15. Silence

Fifteen - Silence - Kankaara

Everything in the little room was simple, from the furnishings to the decoration. Nothing was out of place . . . except for the little bump under the covers on the bed. It gave a twitch as a knock sounded at the door, and a small voice hesitated before calling out, "Come in."

A young girl, about seven, opened the door, stepping inside. Her sandy blonde hair was pulled back into four stubby pigtails at the back of her head, greenish-blue eyes looking curiously at the bed-lump.

"There you are. I was looking for you everywhere."

A tousled, red-haired head poked out from under the blankets, pale blue eyes blinking uncertainly in the sudden light. "I'm sorry."

Temari crossed the room, sitting down beside her little brother. "What's the matter? Why were you hiding?"

Not looking at his big sister, Gaara hugged the stuffed bear he carried tightly. "Kankurō is mad at me," he said miserably. "He was practicing with his puppets, and I made some sand get in the joints and he said he's never going to speak to me again."

Frowning slightly, Temari said, "Why would you put sand in his puppets? You know it might break them."

"I didn't mean to! It was an accident!" Gaara sniffed, hugging his bear again. "He said he was going to tell Daddy on me too . . . ." He looked up as Temari held out her arms, then moved toward her, letting her hug him.

"You should go talk to him," she said. "Remember what Yashamaru says - "Apologies build bridges between fighting friends." You need to apologize, and tell Kankurō it was an accident."

"But what if he doesn't listen?"

Standing up, Temari took her little brother by the hand, starting for the door. "Then I'll go with you and _make_ him listen."

The two of them moved quickly through the halls, until they reached the bedroom door of their middle sibling. Temari knocked. "Kankurō? Are you there?"

The door opened a moment later, revealing a scowling six-year-old. Kankurō glanced at the two of them, not saying anything.

Nudged forward by his sister, Gaara clutched the arm of his toy bear, shifting his feet nervously. "Um . . . I-I just want to say I'm sorry for getting sand in your puppets. It was an accident - I didn't mean to." Kankurō didn't answer. He folded his arms and looked off to one side like Gaara wasn't even there.

The red-headed four-year-old looked back at his sister, who nodded encouragement. "I know you're mad at me, but I'm really, really sorry."

More silence.

Gaara hung his head, looking down at the floor. "I don't want you to be mad at me anymore," he said quietly. "I want to build a bridge, like Yashamaru says, so that me and you don't fight anymore."

Finally, Kankurō sighed - a big-brother sigh. "It's okay," he said. "I'm sorry for getting mad at you. I know it was an accident."

Gaara looked up with a shy, little smile. "Okay. Thank you." He paused for a minute. "Do you want me to try and get the sand out for you?"

The older boy's eyes lit up. "Sure! A lot of it is in pretty deep - I can't reach it, but maybe you can." Gaara's smile grew bigger, happy to help his big brother.


	16. Questioning

Sixteen - Questioning - Chōneji

"Look, I don't care how good you two think you are, you're not getting an answer out of me!" The dark-haired young man had both hands cuffed to the metal chair on which he sat, the head protector knotted around his neck marking him as a shinobi of the Sound.

"That sucks," Chōji commented, opening a fresh bag of chips. "That means we'll be here longer, and I told my mom I'd be home for dinner." Sitting down across the table from the prisoner, he looked contemplatively at the chip bag in his hand before offering it. "Want one?"

"Don't _feed_ him," Neji spoke up from across the room. He stood against the far wall, arms folded and eyes narrowed, watching the Sound-nin. "We're trying to break him, not fatten him up."

Chōji withdrew the bag of chips, looking pityingly at the prisoner. "But he's so scrawny - look at him! You can't live on just prison food."

"He's going to have to for now," the young Hyūga said coldly. "We have a job to do."

"Fine," Chōji sighed. Taking a handful of chips, he scarfed them down before turning his attention to the Sound-nin. "So, what has your leader got you doing all the way out here? What's his name again - Itchymaru or something?"

"My orders from Lord _Orochimaru_ are none of your concern," the captive sniffed, holding his head high.

"Of course they aren't," Neji said, stepping away from the wall. He moved up behind the prisoner's chair. "That's why you're in Interrogation instead of Debriefing."

"The only reason you're not facing ANBU operatives is because we need interrogation practice," Chōji put in.

In a smooth motion, Neji tipped the chair sideways, letting it topple to the floor. It hit with a metallic clatter and a loud "Ow!" on the part of its occupant. Chōji leaned over to look. "Ooooh. That's gotta sting."

Neji stood over the Sound-nin, pearly gray eyes hard in the harsh overhead light. "I am beginning to get frustrated with all this beating around the bush. There was no rule saying we couldn't . . . force an answer."

"Torture?" the prisoner snorted, smirking up at Neji. However, this display of bravado was only half-hearted. They were winning. "I didn't think you guys had it in you."

"It's not really torture; not in the way you're thinking," Chōji said casually, squinting into the bottom of his now almost empty chip bag. "We're not going to draw blood or anything."

"At least not externally." Two fingers stabbed into the Sound-nin's shoulder from behind, causing him to twitch. Neji drew his hand back, smiling humourlessly. "Now, I believe he asked you a question."

The prisoner's eyes widened just noticeably, darting from Neji to his shoulder. "What did you do just now?"

Chōji smiled innocently. "Aw, don't worry about it. All he did was cut off the chakra flow into your arm. So, unless you can do one-handed jutsu, you're in trouble."

"If you're still not ready to talk, I can always cut off the chakra to your other arm as well," Neji said calmly. "Except in very special cases, a shinobi's ninjutsu are the key to his attacks. With your arms disabled, the most you'd be capable of is taijutsu, and I don't see that happening for a while yet."

"I don't care!" the boy spat out. "I won't talk, not for you, or that fatty."

". . . . What did you say?" Chōji said, his expression darkening. He rose from his chair, glaring down at the prisoner.

Neji smiled. Crouching down next to the Sound-nin, he kept his voice low. "Hmm . . . you made him angry. That wasn't very smart." Hauling the chair upright, he stepped aside, allowing his interrogation partner access to their 'friend.' "He's all yours."


	17. Blood

_A/N: Hey, guys, Kiina3 back again! At least I should hope so - it's my penname on this fic after all. A big old shoutout to Herbblade, my betareader, without whom these challengeshots wouldn't get published. _

Seventeen - Blood - Team Seven

"AAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Birds took flight at the super-volume yell, setting up a racket of their own. The initial noise was abruptly muffled as Sasuke threw himself at Naruto, clamping both hands over the younger boy's mouth.

"Shut up, will you?" he hissed, glancing around quickly to make sure no one was approaching. "What the heck is wrong with you?"

Naruto's face was rapidly paling. "There was a . . . razor wire in the bush we just passed . . . . Got me on the leg . . . ."

Sasuke's eyes flicked to the wound, widening when he saw it. Bright red blood pulsed out through a gash on the blond boy's upper thigh - an arterial cut.

Swearing under his breath, he leaned forward, pressing both hands - one on top of the other - over the injury. "Take your jacket off," he snapped. "We need something that'll stop the bleeding." Watching as the blood continued to seep slowly from between his fingers, he wondered what Kakashi could have been thinking, stretching a tripwire at that height. Was he _trying_ to get someone killed?

Naruto sat forward, holding out his jacket. "Here - ow!"

"Idiot, don't sit up, you'll make it worse!" Freeing one hand, he snatched the cloth, pressing it against the wound and applying pressure. "Cross your leg over this for a second, I have to change sides." Pausing long enough for Naruto to do as bid, he jumped to the other side, taking back the jacket and raising the leg so it rested on his own knee. "Lie still - someone's bound to have heard you, screaming like that."

"I wasn't _screaming_," Naruto scowled, lying flat on his back. "You'd do the same if something just about took your leg off!"

"Shut up, moron."

"Sasuke? Naruto?" The bushes rustled off to the left, Sakura emerging seconds later. "There you are - I heard screaming; what happened?"

"Idiot cut an artery on razor wire," Sasuke gritted. "Give the emergency signal."

The pink-haired girl's eyes shot briefly toward the slowly reddening jacket before she gave a short nod. "Right." Taking a long, thin whistle from her pouch, she blew three short blasts.

Naruto was just beginning to grasp the severity of his situation. "A-an _artery_?" He repeated, staring at Sasuke. "How bad is it? Tell me, I can take it!"

A smirk curled one corner of the Uchiha's mouth. "If I stop pressing on it," he said slowly, "it'll only take a few minutes before all your blood comes out and you die. I don't know, though, my hands are starting to get tired . . . ."

"AAAAAAGGGH! NO, KEEP PRESSING! I DON'T WANNA BLEED TO DEATH!"

"Hysterical already? We've only been out here for an hour," a new voice said calmly. Sasuke and Sakura looked up to see Kakashi crouched in a nearby tree, his ever-present book open, eyes focused on the words. "I take it Naruto found the razor wire?"

Sakura nodded. "We should probably get him to the hospital again."

"I could lose my leg over this I'm too young to die Kakashi-sensei, you're gonna pay for this! Gah how am I going to train like this this is all your fault Kakashi-sensei! When I get my hands on you -" _Thunk. _Naruto lapsed mercifully into silence as he passed out from a combination of blood loss and Sasuke giving him a whack on the side of the head.

_PS: Wanna review? I shall give you cookies . . . . ^^_


	18. Rainbow

**Eighteen - Rainbow - Gailee**

The best part of preschool at the ninja academy was free time, at least in Lee's opinion. All the other kids went and played with each other, but he liked the art corner much better. For half an hour every day, he got to just be by himself and paint. Sure, the colours got all over his hands and sometimes on his face and clothes, but it was _fun_.

The teacher crouched beside him, studying his newest work. "What have you painted today?"

"Can't you tell?" the little artist said in disbelief. "It's me!" He stabbed a finger toward a stick person in the middle of the paper. "See, that's me right there."

"What about these people?" The teacher pointed to a dozen other stick people, lying in different places, all with little X's for eyes. "What happened to them?"

"They were bad mens," Lee said seriously, frowning. "I beat them all up. Because that's what I'm going to do when I get big. I'm gonna beat up bad mens."

Standing, the teacher smiled. "I'm sure you will."

Across the room, the door burst open, drawing everyone's attention. A man stepped in, wearing a green one-piece outfit, orange legwarmers, a flak jacket, and a giant grin. "GREETINGS, ANKLEBITERS!"

Twenty-four children around the room burst into tears.

Lee stared at the newcomer. "Who - who is _that_?" he asked, turning to look up at his teacher.

"That's our special guest today." The teacher wasn't smiling; she looked really mad. Maybe because the guest had scared all the other kids. Walking into the middle of the room, she clapped her hands. "It's okay, children. Come on - everybody come to the story area. We have a special guest who's come to talk to us!"

Five minutes, seated with the rest of his classmates, Lee listened, fascinated, as the loud man told them all about life as a ninja. He was just so . . . cool!

The loud man's face got very serious. "Who can tell me what the hardest part of being a ninja is?"

Answers came in from all over the group. "Fighting?" "The Ninja Academy?" "Going to the potty by yourself?"

Shaking his head, the loud man smiled. "No, not quite." His eyes landed on Lee's raised hand. "Yes - you."

Lee sat up straighter, putting his hand down. "Is it training?"

"Very close!" The loud man gave one of his giant grins and a thumbs-up. A couple of the kids around Lee whimpered a little bit. "Training is difficult, it's true. But what's even _more_ difficult is training and _looking good at the same time_!"

"Hey, Mister, wait!"

The loud man turned around as Lee ran up behind him, holding a rolled-up painting. "Well, well, what do we have here?"

"I wanted to give you something, Mister, to say thank you for coming to visit my class." Lee held up the painting for the loud man to see. "See?" Splashed across the paper was a big rainbow, and under it, two stick figures. "It's you and me, because I'm going to be a great ninja like you!"

The loud man crouched down, and smiled. "Well, that _is_ impressive! What is your name?"

"My name is Rock Lee."

The two of them shook hands. "Nice to meet you, Lee. My name is Maito Gai."


	19. Shiny

_Oh crap, she's back again. With a disclaimer! I do not own Naruto. Herbblade is a maaaaaaaaahvelous betareader. Without her, my writing would suck. ^^ Enjoy!_

Nineteen - Shiny - Hinaten

The brown-haired girl sat with her elbows on her knees, staring at the desk across the room. Or rather, the object _on_ that desk. It was so unfair - who gave detention to a six-year-old? So she'd been late for class again - her daddy said that even grown-up shinobi were late sometimes. Big deal.

"Um . . . ."

She turned to look at the only other person in the room; Iruka-sensei said she hadn't had her clothes for gym class or something? Could you _get_ detention for that? They were so _strict_ at the Academy. "You say something?"

It was a girl with blueish-black hair cut short, two longer side pieces framing her face. She had the same eyes as that one jerk in Tenten's class. Maybe they were related or something.

"I - I was just wondering . . . um . . . what you're looking at."

Tenten tilted her chin at the anonymous tan item sitting on the desk. "Iruka-sensei left his pouch behind when he left a couple minutes ago." She glanced at the other girl and smiled slyly. "You ever seen what's in one of those?"

"N-no, not really . . . ."

"Really?" She sighed. "Daddy won't let me try anything with his tools; says I'm not old enough yet, that I might hurt myself. I mean, I know they're dangerous and stuff, but . . . ." She trailed off, going back to staring at the pouch. Maybe she could go and peek - Iruka-sensei probably wouldn't be back for a while yet.

". . . M-my name's Hinata," the shy girl said suddenly.

"Tenten," was the absent reply. After a few seconds' hesitation, she slid down from her chair, starting for the front of the room.

"Wh-what are you doing? Iruka-sensei told us to stay here," Hinata protested, pearly eyes growing wider as she watched.

"Relax, I'm not _going_ anywhere." She hoisted herself onto the chair behind Iruka-sensei's desk. "I just wanna have a look." She sat still, working up the nerve to go snooping through the grown-up sensei's stuff. Hinata got up and came to the front too, still looking shy and nervous.

Finally, Tenten reached up and slowly opened the pouch. Hinata leaned forward a little to see better. Carefully, the little brunette hooked a finger through the circle at the end of a throwing knife and lifted it out of place. Her brown eyes got wider as the dangerously pointed weapon came free of its carrier, dangling from her fingertip.

"Wow . . ." she breathed.

It almost seemed to call her name. She sat stock-still, eyes riveted on the metal, watching it reflect the light as it hung there. The flat of the blade gave off a dull shine, but the edges glinted with a wicked, cutting sharpness. It was so . . . pretty . . . .

Giving it a half-twirl, Tenten caught the handle in her small palm, gripping it tight. It was a movement she'd seen her father do a hundred times. You could throw it like this, or use it as a close-combat weapon. The shine of the blade caught her attention again, and she smiled. She held the kunai up to her face, watching the slightly distorted, barely visible brown eye staring back at her. The light coming from the windows caught the edge of the blade again, reflecting off onto the wall. So shiny . . . .

Soft footsteps sounded from out in the hall. Hinata's head whipped around with a little squeak of surprise. "Iruka-sensei's back!" she whispered, mortified.

Closing the pouch, Tenten scampered back to her chair, Hinata right behind her. There was no time to put the kunai back - she tucked it in her pocket, careful not to stab or cut herself.

But for the rest of the day, she could just picture the light reflecting off the shiny edge of the blade.


	20. Cookies

_A/N: This is one of the first challengeshots I wrote, meaning it was one of my first Naruto fics. I can't believe this is the twentieth shot! A big thank you to all who have given me such lovely comments! You all make me very happy. ^^ And a special thank you to my awesome beta, Herbblade, for catching all my mistakes, and putting up with emails and attachment files when DocX won't work. :3_

**Twenty - Cookies - Team Asuma**

Shikamaru regarded the table doubtfully. "Are you for real?" he said, eyes shifting sideways to Asuma. "Can't we just play shougi like usual?"

"Shougi's a two-person game," Ino put in, her arms folded. "In case you didn't notice, Shikamaru, there's four of us here."

"ALL RIGHT! COOKIES!"

Asuma stepped in just in time to stop Chōji from diving onto the table. "Whoa, hold on a second." He turned to face the other two. "Ino's right - shougi isn't the sort of game you can play with four people." Reaching behind him, he swatted Chōji's hand away from the cookies on the table. "However, shougi isn't the only strategy game out there."

Still doubtful, Shikamaru studied the cards and stacks of different cookies on the table. "You're going to teach us how to play poker."

"What?" Ino's eyes widened. "Asuma-sensei, we're all still underage! We can't gamble!"

"Which is why we're using cookies, not money," Asuma said, pushing Chōji firmly into a seat. "Besides - if you win, you get to _eat_ your take, right?"

The boy's eyes gleamed. "Right on, Sensei! Let's do this!"

"All right." The three others found seats around the table, Asuma divvying up the cookies. "Now - the almond cookies are worth the least, then the crescents, then the spice, green tea, and pumpkin cookies, got it?" Heads nodded. "Good - here's how to play . . . ."

Ino yawned, supporting her chin on one hand. "Asuma-sensei, it's almost three in the morning - don't you think we've had enough for one night?"

"Never!" Chōji exclaimed from behind a veritable wall of cookies. "I'm not quitting until I've taken you for everything you've got!"

"Seriously, Chōji, where'd you learn to play so well?" Shikamaru said, hunching over his own pitiful little pile of cookies. "You can't have gotten this good in the six hours we've been playing."

A snicker sounded from behind the cookie wall. "Where do you think our dads go every Thursday night?"

Ino shrugged. "He's never said anything to me. I assumed he just had some meeting or something that night. Why?"

"Because," Chōji snickered. "Every Thursday, our dads get together with Asuma-sensei and play _real_ poker! Dad taught me to play years ago!"

Blonde hair whipped around as Ino shot a look at Asuma. "Is he serious? Really?"

Asuma smiled, unconcerned. "Well, I thought you knew. Don't you remember last week when your dad came home without his clothes?"

The girl's eyes doubled in size. "Are you saying . . . . You mean that . . . . Dad's clothes . . . . But . . . ." Lapsing into silence, Ino continued to stare, dumbfounded, at her sensei.

Shikamaru smirked. "I don't suppose we get to try that tonight, do we?"

"WE ARE SO NOT, SHIKAMARU, DON'T EVEN GO THERE!"

"Are you guys gonna give me the rest of your cookies or what? I'm starvin', here!"

_In honour of the twentieth shot, won't you please, please review? There might still be cookies left if you do . . . . _^^


	21. Vacation

_A/N: Sorry for the long delay in updating. I may have mentioned this before, but I write several shots in advance of the one to be posted, and the latest one was kicking my butt almost as hard as Lee. _ Anyway - here's the new one! Many thanks to my betareader Herbblade for all her suggestions! I do not own Naruto. _

**Twenty-one - Vacation - Sand Siblings**

It was the Land of Wind's best-kept secret, the most beautiful spot in the country. It was called Saraswati Oasis, located two days west from the Hidden Sand Village, literally in the middle of the desert. A half-mile-wide clump of trees suddenly reared out of the sand, shading a pool of water and a cozy little inn that catered to the wealthiest and most influential families in the country.

"Wow . . . . Hard to believe that we haven't been here since we were kids," Kankurō commented as he looked around. "It really hasn't changed, has it?"

"Are you still obsessed with the koi?" Temari asked, grinning as she gestured to a small pond off to one side. "Remember, you spent a whole afternoon trying to catch one. You actually fell in, too."

"Yeah, because you pushed me."

Gaara watched the exchange between his older siblings, privately imagining what it must have looked like, Kankurō trying to catch a fish. He had been too young at the time to have any memory of it. Mentally shaking his head, he followed after his brother and sister as they headed toward the inn's front entrance.

.:|:.

Afternoon sun filtered through the tree canopy, marking the sand around the pool of water with a mixture of shadow and light. Kankurō was in the water, doing laps around the mostly circular space. Temari sat with her back against a tree, a book in her hands. Gaara lay flat on his back in the sun beside her, both eyes closed, soaking up the warmth of the sand.

"Aren't either of you going to swim?"

The still-dry siblings looked over to where Kankurō stood hip-deep in the water, hand on his hips. Temari immediately clapped a hand over her mouth, Gaara blinking once at his brother's appearance.

"Um, I think you should've taken your facepaint off before you went in," the blonde said after a moment, still fighting not to giggle.

Looking down, Kankurō studied his reflection in the water. Rivulets of purple ran all over his face from the streaks across his nose and chin. The paint around his mouth had run so that it looked as though he wore an exaggerated frown. "Yeah. I think you're right." Ducking down, he splashed water onto his face, scrubbing vigourously with both hands.

The afternoon passed slowly, the sun slowly sinking lower in the sky as Gaara gave in and joined his brother in the water. Temari was content merely to supervise. Finally, the three siblings left the beach, following the short path back toward the inn. Colourful lanterns were strung throughout the trees on either side, giving soft illumination in the gathering dusk.

It was the perfect spot for an ambush.

The three of them had gone only about ten metres into the trees when three masked figures dropped from above, landing directly on the path ahead.

"Kazekage," the one in the middle greeted, nodding once. "We've been waiting for you."

Kankurō sighed. "This is supposed to be a _vacation_," he complained. "We're not supposed to have to _work_ when we're on _vacation_." He grinned at the three in front of them, teeth glinting dangerously in the light from the lanterns. "I don't like it when people mess up my plans."

"And you obviously didn't do your homework before setting this little meeting up," Temari informed them, mildly amused. "Or don't you care that the Kazekage has weapons with him at all times?

"What do you mean?" one of the would-be attackers demanded, eyes narrowing above the tight mask that covered the rest of his face.

He got his answer seconds later as an influx of sand came rushing up the path behind the three siblings. "Brace yourselves," Gaara said tonelessly, staring down the group's leader.


	22. Mother Nature

_A/N: This is one of my favourites, lol. I rather enjoyed making Kisame suffer. In case you're wondering, the ongaonga bush is an actual plant, lol. I've never seen one, and from the description, I hope I never do. O_O Much thanks to Herbblade, my oh-so-awesome beta. I do not own Naruto._

**Twenty-two - Mother Nature - Kisori**

Kisame and Sasori. The two of them had been sent to set up the barrier around the Akatsuki's new headquarters. Five seals in five different locations, very tricky to remove all at once. Thankfully, they could be put up one at a time.

Kisame had already posted one seal tag on a cliff side 100 metres from his current position. From there, he'd been told, he needed to go 500 metres southwest, into the forest. And so he had. Although today, Mother Nature seemed out to get him.

He rubbed irritably at his left ankle, which was stinging from the plant he'd just brushed against. The thing was huge - almost a metre in width, with big spines growing on each leaf. He checked his ankle - no blood, but it was stinging like poorly performed acupuncture. Growling in annoyance, he carried on.

He hated forests. He was from the Land of Water, not the Land of Walking in the Woods. All the trees and plants crowded together was almost claustrophobic. Stupid freaking forest . . . .

Shouldering through a clump of dark red bushes, he paused to tug his snagged sleeve free. An oily substance was brushed over his arm and his lip curled in disgust. Great - now some plant was bleeding on him or something. Using the sleeve of his opposite arm, he tried to wipe it off as best as he could.

Crap, it was starting to burn and itch now. Pretty badly, too. Taking a flat water canteen from its place on his belt, he poured a little on the offended area, scrubbing at it again with the opposite sleeve. The normally blue skin was taking on a purple tinge, little pustules starting to form after just five minutes. Making a 'tsch' sound under his breath, Kisame replaced the canteen on his belt and kept moving. The faster he finished, the faster he could go back to the 'lair' and get something to treat this weird rash thing.

His ankle was still stinging too. What kind of monster plants did they have around here? Forget setting any other traps - just put a bunch of leafy things around the entrance. That'd keep any intruders busy.

Had he gone 500 metres yet? There was no really sure way to tell, other than instinct. Screw this - he was just going to place the thing and head back. If Pain had a problem, it was _his_ problem.

Taking the second seal tag from his pouch, he gathered chakra into his feet, walking partway up the side of a tree and attaching the thing. After making sure it was stuck down tight, he dropped back to the ground.

His injured ankle nearly gave out as he landed, causing him to overbalance, falling against the tree trunk. The burning itch from his arm was starting to spread - he could feel it on his cheek and the right side of his neck, just starting to make itself felt. He could tell that one of the gills on his face was becoming swollen and inflamed. He scratched furiously at the irritation on his arm, purple-painted fingernails digging into the skin.

"Looks like you've run into some trouble," a gravelly voice said from behind him. Hiruko crouched against the ground, watching the taller shinobi suffer.

"Really - what gave you that idea," Kisame ground out, pointed teeth clenched together. "You get your part of the job done?"

"Yes." The unblinking eyes watched the sharklike man continue scratching for a moment. "Would you like something to make that stop?"

"Definitely. I'm about ready to chop my arm off . . . ."

"Sit." Approaching, the older shinobi drew a small jar from somewhere within his cloak, holding it forward. "Here - spread this where the rash is. It may sting a bit at first." He fell silent as the other did as he was told. Seconds after the ointment touched his affected skin, Kisame let out a howl of surprise.

"YOWWW! You call that a sting? It's freaking _burning!_" He jaw clenched tighter. "It's just making it worse, you idiot!"

Hiruko didn't move. "If you hadn't been stupid enough to walk through a clump of poison ivy, not to mention getting poked by that ongaonga bush, you wouldn't be in this mess. Now shut up, you're only embarrassing yourself."

_Addendum: I'm now accepting pairing requests for future shots! I can't guarantee that they'll get up here immediately, but if you leave me your pen name, I can give you a sneak preview! Please, no yaoi, yuri, or lemon requests. Thank you! ^^_


	23. Cat

_A/N: Yeah . . . this one really has no point at all, other than to finish up what Challenge 8 started with the whole "Sakura vs. Daimyo's Annoying Wife" thing. Thanks to Herbblade for all her help! I do not own Naruto._

**Twenty-three - Cat - Team Seven**

The three of them lay flat on a rooftop, overlooking the main gate of the village. Madam Shijimi could be seen just leaving, signing out with Kotestu and Izumo at the guard station. The newly returned Tora was clutched under the meaty arm of the departing noble.

"Well? What do you think?" Sakura said quietly.

Naruto squirmed, impatient as always. "Let's just go for it. It's three on one."

"Moron - look past the gate. We try anything now, we're going to get caught." The other two followed Sasuke's direction, spotting the four bodyguards waiting just beyond the village limit for their charge to finish her business.

"Why're you here anyway?" Naruto shot back.

"Someone has to make sure you don't end up being arrested for attacking a daimyo's wife," was the expressionless answer. "That, and I want to see how you plan to get the cat."

"We can't do anything while she's still in the village," Sakura said, thinking out loud. "She'd just turn around and go back to Tsunade-sama. So we'll have to follow her, and wait until we have a clear shot."

Madam Shijimi's retinue had stopped early, at a roadside inn just ten miles from Konohagakure. Two of her guards stood outside the main entrance, the others gathered outside the door to her room. Outside, three young ninja crouched on the roof above her window, waiting as night fell.

"It's been quiet for over an hour," Sakura whispered. "She has to be asleep by now. Let's move."

Naruto went over the edge of the roof, a rope tied around his middle. Sasuke braced himself against the roof's peak, lowering the other boy bit by bit. Sakura leaned over the edge, watching Naruto's progress; finally, she held up a hand. "Okay, that's good."

Swinging gently to one side of the window, Naruto stretched out an arm, managing to catch hold of a carving on the side of the building. Pulling himself in, he looked over at the wooden shutters blocking the glass - they would have to open first. Gathering chakra into his feet, he braced himself against the wall and reached for the latch.

The shutters opened slightly as the latch popped loose, the sounds of snoring wafting out into the night. The windows were already open.

Naruto looked up at Sakura and grinned. "All set!" he stage-whispered, receiving a nod in confirmation. A quiet 'mrow?' came from inside the window; Naruto looked over to see a wary-looking Tora staring back at him. "Oh, hey, little guy -"

_Smack!_ A gust of wind sent one of the shutters slamming back into Naruto's face. He let out a yell, the distraction causing him to lose all control over the chakra in his feet. He fell away from the wall, yanked to a stop by the rope around his waist. Seconds later, the rope went slack, two more yells adding to the cacophony.

Unprepared for the sudden weight on the opposite end of the rope, Sasuke was pulled off-balance and forward, skidding head-first down the roof. He cannoned into Sakura, the two of them shooting out into open space, and dropping two storeys to land next to a slightly stunned Naruto.

"Owww . . . ." the blond boy groaned, rubbing at his head. He sat up carefully, looking up at the window. "Hey, check it out!" Tora, looking smug at his new escape, was streaking across the wide lawn for the nearby road.

Sakura smiled, pushing herself to her knees. "All right!" She looked up as shouts came from Madam Shijimi's bedroom window, her smile dropping away.

". . . . Maybe it's time we got out of here too . . . ."

_I'm still accepting pairing requests for future challengeshots. All I ask is no yaoi, yuri, or lemon requests, please. Let me know! ^^_


	24. Age

_A/N: Sorry it's been so long, everyone! I managed to find a job, and the hours are crazy. Plus, my beta is working too, so that makes things a little difficult. So here's an update - sorry for the wait! _

**Twenty-four - Age - Team Ga**i

"I am telling you, Gai-sensei has not contacted me in over 24 hours! Something is definitely wrong," Lee said forcefully, marching up to his sensei's front door.

"And I'm telling you, he probably just has better things to do," Neji retorted from behind, trailing at a more sedate pace. "We only just got back yesterday after a week-long mission - he's likely just as tired as we are, and wanted to give us time to rest up."

Lee's finger stabbed accusingly at his teammate. "Then why did you follow me all the way here?"

The door swung open before Neji could answer. Unfortunately, the person standing there only gave Lee another chance to open his mouth.

"Tenten! What are you doing here?"

_Smack!_ Lee grimaced from the flat-handed blow to the side of his head as the girl scolded. "Keep your voice down, will you?" She stepped aside, allowing the two boys to enter. "For your information, I'm only here because I had to take Gai-sensei to the hospital."

Lee exploded. "_THE HOSPITAL?_"

A weak voice sounded from further within the apartment. "Tenten, is that Lee and Neji? Send them in - I want to have one last look at them before . . . ." Gai trailed off, sounding quite miserable.

"_I AM COMING, GAI-SENSEEEIIIIIIII!_" Barely stopping to take off his sandals, Lee bolted toward the living area, leaving Neji to ask the questions.

"What did he need the hospital for?"

Tenten shook her head. "Remember the kunai that nicked his foot when we were on our last mission? The cut it left got infected on the way back - he said it was taken care of, but I caught a glimpse of it the night before we arrived; it was a mess, so I went today and dragged him to go get checked out."

She giggled a little as they followed after Lee. "Unfortunately, the doctor discovered another foot problem Gai-sensei had been hiding."

"Like what?"

"Believe it or not - gout. The doctor told him that any adult can get it, but Gai-sensei didn't listen and keeps associating it with being "old," so . . . ."

She gestured mutely to where Gai, bundled in a grey blanket with glasses on his nose, sat in a rocking chair, looking sadly at a sobbing Lee on the floor. "Savour your youth, Lee, because one day . . . . " He sniffed, causing his glasses to wobble. "You'll be old . . . _JUST LIKE MEEEEEEEEE . . . ._"

Lee looked up, tears practically pouring down his face. "No, Gai-sensei! If you must be old and confined to a chair for the rest of your life -" He dove onto the couch, lying flat, as though immobile. "-then so will I!"

Gai sniffled, wiping at his own tears. "Ohh, Lee . . . ." He clenched a fist. "No! You must not - you must go out and revel in the power of youth!" Springing to his feet, he caught Lee by the shoulders, pulling him up so they were face to face. "You must live for both of us!"

The boy saluted. "If that is your wish, then I will do it, Gai-sensei!" The two of them fell back to sobbing in a giant, standing-up mass of green.

Neji sighed. "It's going to take them a while to stop . . . ."

Tenten nodded. "Afraid so."


	25. Payback

_A/N: I'm sorry I've been gone so long! It's been like . . . a month? Longer? I'm not really sure anymore. I've been working on future challengeshots, as well as a similar series for Bleach, plus school and homework and work and vacation before that . . . ugh. Anyway. I haven't been in touch with my beta-reader, so if this one sucks . . . it's my fault. Just a random little piece for the heck of it. Enjoy! _

Twenty-five - Payback - Tsuniba

"He was supposed to leave over an hour ago! Where is he?"

The two of them sat on the rooftop, watching the street below. There had been a somewhat constant stream of people coming in and out of the building all morning, none of them the person they were watching for.

Abruptly, Kiba leaned forward, watching the newest figure to emerge. "About time," he muttered, a grin stealing onto his face. "What do you think? Should we get him?" A quiet yap and a wagging tail were all the agreement he needed. Picking up the thin tube from where it lay beside him, he brought it to his mouth, took aim and fired.

_Ffft! Ffft! Ffft! _

Splat! Splat! Splat!

"GAH!"

Snickering to himself, Kiba drew back from the roof's edge. Aside from the whisker marks on his face, Naruto now also had three large blotches of ink from the pellets the Dog-User had just fired.

"What are you doing, lurking around up here?" A voice asked from behind him. Kiba turned to find Lady Tsunade standing ten feet away, arms folded in a businesslike manner, eyeing him suspiciously. The thin blowpipe in his hand was evidence that he was up to no good; it was too late to hide it.

"And just what poor, unfortunate soul is your target?" the Hokage asked, raised one blonde eyebrow.

"Naruto," Kiba muttered, looking down at the rooftop.

There was a sigh. "What did he do this time?"

"Tried to copy my answers on the latest Shinobi Aptitude Test. And he also got me with three water balloons last week."

A pause. "Really . . . ." Tsunade said thoughtfully. Curious at her tone, Kiba looked up - she was staring off to one side, seemingly lost in thought. "Isn't that interesting."

". . . . Ma'am?"

"Someone was in my office the day before that test, looking through the documents belonging to the Academy. Sakura came in just as the intruder was leaving through the window, and she swears up and down it was Naruto . . . . Unfortunately, there's no actual proof, so we can't corner him on it."

She returned her gaze to Kiba, smirking slightly. "You were trying to give him a message, weren't you?" Shifting uneasily, not sure if he was in trouble or not, Kiba nodded."Hmm. Well, you had the right idea, but ink pellets are child's play."

The young Inuzuka blinked once in puzzlement. ". . . . What do you mean?"

The Hokage's smirk changed to a full-out grin. "I mean, to teach a lesson like this, you need a much stronger curriculum. Like the one I've already put into play."

Kiba stared. The Hokage, pulling a prank on someone? Granted, this _was_ Tsunade, but he hadn't really thought it possible. "What did you do?"

She smiled proudly. "I asked Sakura to put crushed gravel in his sandals the first chance she got. Nothing horrible, but serious discomfort if he wore them at all. Not to mention the stinging nettles that found their way into a bowl of ramen."

It was more than a surprise - it was a shock that the Hokage would stoop to this. Kiba was finding it hard not to laugh at the sheer gutsiness of it all.

"You're right - ink pellets are kids' stuff," he said, returning her grin. "Have you got anything else in mind?"

"Well, since you asked . . . ."

_PS - I'm still accepting character suggestions for future challengeshots! Any two or three chars at all, just no yaoi, yuri, or furry. Okay? All righty. PM me with your request!_


	26. Sarcasm

_A/N: Just for you, here's a special 'Happy Turkey Day!' chapter! Sadly, it has nothing to do with turkey. Or actually . . . Sai's a turkey. There we go. I own nothing!_

Twenty-six - Sarcasm - Saino

He should have paid attention all those times Shikamaru said that girls were a pain. Rubbing absently at the starkly red slap mark on his cheek, Sai stared out at the forest from his position atop Konoha's outer wall. He wasn't even clear on what he'd said or done to receive such treatment . . . .

_The two of them had been out for a walk. Sai had been to the hospital to check on a wounded Root member, and had chanced upon Ino just as she was coming off her shift. Going in the same direction anyway, they had elected to walk together._

_She, as usual, had done most of the talking. He was content to listen, and reply only when necessary. The topic changed from small talk, to goings-on at the hospital, to their respective teams, and from there to recent missions. _

"How was the Land of Forests?" she asked, hands folded behind her back.

"Captain Yamato seemed to enjoy himself," he answered. "Being in a place full of trees must have agreed with him."

"Sakura told me about the houses he made using Wood Style Jutsu on your first mission as a team," Ino said, thoughtfully. "Can he really make something that big in less than ten seconds?" Sai nodded, prompting her to mutter, "Wow . . . ."

_Neither of them had made mention of the fact that they were a couple. Not even their respective teams knew. Ino didn't want Chōji and Shikamaru to tease her about dating Sai, and Sai knew his colleagues in Root wouldn't approve. Consequently, the times they saw each other were polite and enjoyable, but unless they were someplace private or unobserved, there was no physical contact. _

_The only problem was, Ino was a girl, and according to everything Sai had read on the subject, girls needed constant attention. _

"I just don't see where this relationship is going," she'd said that afternoon, six weeks after they'd begun their game of sneaking around behind everyone's backs. "I mean, I still like you and everything, but don't you think it's time we got this out in the open?"

Sai laced his fingers together in his lap, looking down at them. "I explained to you why we can't. Not right now."

"Well, then at least talk to me," the blonde pressed. "When we're together, I feel like I'm the one doing all the talking. I keep waiting for your ears to drop off!"

Unbidden, Sai's memory flashed on a shirt he'd seen the other day. It had been worn by a young girl working behind the counter at the grocery in his neighbourhood. Without thinking, he repeated what it had said.

"Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand."

Silence fell, prompting him to look up. Ino was standing stock still, gaping at him. After a second of evaluation, he placed her expression at "surprised and outraged." This was proven true seconds later as her fast-moving palm connected with his cheek. Puzzled, he watched as she stormed out through the door.

The mark still had yet to fade. Sai was beginning to suspect she'd used chakra to turn a simple slap mark into a first-degree burn. Kami knew she had the ability; and he could only be lucky that she hadn't used a full-out Tsunade- or Sakura-style punch.

Still, in the six weeks where he could have been labelled as "Ino's boyfriend," he had learned a very critical truth. That Shikamaru was right.

. . . . Perhaps a 'girlfriend' just wasn't in Sai's future.


	27. Sugar

_A/N: Uuuuuuuhoooooooh . . . . Looks like whatever meds Oro's on, Kabuto needs to take him off of! This one is written purely for the crack - it's crack, I know it's crack, and if you don't wanna read crack, then leave and don't flame me. Otherwise, read on, laugh, and review. ^^_

**Twenty-seven - Sugar - Kabuchimaru**

Turning away from his worktable, the silver-haired medic-nin rolled his shoulders, wincing at the popping sounds the motion generated. He'd been working for nearly 32 hours, trying to find something that would relieve the pain in Orochimaru-sama's arms. The first attempt at a painkiller, while effective, had resulted in the head of the newly formed Sound Village acting very strange.

Speaking of which, perhaps it was time to check up on the fearless leader. Leaving the laboratory, he moved tiredly along the hall. After he looked in on the Sannin, it was definitely time for a nap.

Passing the kitchen area, he paused, and backtracked. There, with a box of cake mix clamped in his teeth - useless arms dangling like limp ramen noodles - was Lord Orochimaru. At the sight of his assistant, he dropped the box.

"Ah, good. Would you mind opening this for me?"

Kabuto blinked, staring incredulously at the snake-like man. "Uh . . . . Orochimaru-sama, may I ask what you're doing?"

"It's quite obvious, Kabuto," was the dignified - if slightly slurred - reply. "I'm going to bake a cake."

Approaching cautiously, the young missing-nin gingerly picked up the cake mix. "Perhaps you should go lie down - I don't think you should be up and about while you're like this."

Orochimaru pulled himself up to his full height, staring imperiously at his minion. "I am the Otokage, and I will bake a cake if I want to."

With a quiet sigh, Kabuto set the box on a nearby table. "Very well. Why do you want to bake a cake so badly?" He waited as the older man's forehead furrowed, eyebrows drawing together in thought. Long seconds ticked by . . . .

At last his expression cleared. "Ah! Because it's Sasuke's birthday soon!" he said proudly.

He could only stare, dumbfounded. "Orochimaru-sama, Sasuke's birthday isn't for another month yet. And I distinctly remember him saying that he doesn't like sweet things."

"Hmph. It fits; he's such a sour person anyway."

Silence descended on the room. Orochimaru was staring at his useless arms, and Kabuto watched him closely. Hopefully, the medication would stop at simply making his master a bit silly, and not send him into a boiling psychotic state.

Swaying slightly, Orochimaru grinned as he watched his limp limbs move about. Finally, Kabuto moved closer, reaching out a hand to stop him. This was different from the last reaction to the dosage . . . .

"Orochimaru-sama, did you remember to take your medication with food?"

"Yes, I did," was the proud answer. "Puddle helped me."

Puddle . . . ? Oh yes, the subject of an ongoing experiment, Hōzuki Suigetsu. "Very good. And what did you take it with?"

This drew a snort from the snake-man. "With cake, obviously. And it was the last piece, so I have to bake a new one to eat with my medicine tomorrow."

"Orochimaru-sama, you know you're not supposed to have sugar." His patience was starting to wear thin. Taking his master's shoulder, he guided him toward the door. "You're hypoglycemic; you should know what the stuff does to you."

"But it tastes good."

"And it's bad for you."

"I don't care." Falling into silence, Orochimaru allowed himself to be led for a few metres before speaking again. "Kabuto? Can we stop by the little snakies' room?"


	28. Hindsight

**Twenty-eight - Hindsight - Kankaara**

There had been no warning of the Akatsuki's attack on Sunagakure - hardly anyone had even known that the organization existed, let alone that they were after jinchūriki and would be coming for Gaara. And now that the One-Tail was gone, the Fifth Kazekage would hopefully be left alone.

Of course, there was no guarantee, and so they were using mistakes made in the past to help prepare for the future.

"He entered from the north, airborne," Gaara said, hands folded under his chin as he surveyed the map between them. "Is there a way that we could detect a similar attack other than guards?"

His usual hood lying discarded to one side, Kankurō scratched at his spiky brown hair in thought. "I don't know. It's too big an area for a chakra web. But why not keep using the guards?"

"No offense to them, but they proved that there's a factor of human error," the younger teen said solemnly. "I wasn't thinking of replacing them with a new system, but adding it as a form of backup."

"Ah. Makes sense."

The two of them were silent again, thinking. Finally, Kankurō spoke up. "What about proximity alarms? They can be set to detect within a certain range, from close up to half a mile away."

"Hmm," the young Kazekage said, considering. "That does get rid of the human error problem. But what's to stop them detecting a bird flying over?"

"Along with setting the range, you can tweak it so that it will only send up an alarm for things of a certain size or larger." Propping his chin up with his hand, Kankurō frowned. "On top of that, it can also sense motion, heat, sound . . . stuff like that."

"Sounds like what we're looking for," Gaara nodded. "How do we get them?"

"Ah . . . ." Getting to his feet, Kankurō started for the door, grinning sheepishly. "I'm . . . gonna go look into that. I'll let you know what I find."

-x-

Two weeks later, the cliffs surrounding the Hidden Sand Village were dotted with cylindrical sensors, each the size of a man's hand. They were spaced at intervals of one hundred metres, and set to detect anything human-sized or larger coming in below an altitude of one thousand feet.

Harsh noon sunlight beat down on the roof of the Administration building, Kankurō and Gaara standing atop it. The puppetmaster held a small box with dozens of small buttons and a tiny screen - the controller for the new sensors.

"Ready for the demonstration?" he said, grinning at his younger brother. Receiving a nod in response, he turned his attention to the controls. Arm the sensors . . . input security code . . . 41171 . . . sensors active.

A small explosion came from off to the left, followed by another, and another . . . soon, the whole clifftop was lighting up with little flashes as the sensors combusted.

". . . The hell?" Frowning at the little device in his hand, Kankurō glanced between it and the thin plumes of smoke rising in the distance. A message flashed on the controller's screen. "Aww, man . . . they overheated . . . . The sun must have fried the insides."

"Perhaps we need to find another method."

"Yeah . . . . I think you're right."

As Gaara turned to leave, Kankurō continued to stare out at the clifftop. Maybe Temari would have some ideas . . . .


	29. Happiness

_A/N: I'm baaaaaa~aaaaack! After a long absence (in which I suffered terrible writer's block for these stories), I have returned, victorious once again! Enjoy. :)_

**Twenty-nine - Happiness - KakaGai**

_Taptaptap!_ "Kakashi? Are you awake?"

"Mmmf." Head pounding, the silver-haired boy tried to burrow further into his pillow. He'd been up half the night, with his stomach rebelling and his head stuffed to bursting with a cold, and his seven-year-old self was just plain tuckered out.

"There's someone here to see you," his father persisted, opening the door. "I don't think you're contagious anymore, and a visit might do you good."

Kakashi kept his eyes closed. Great - just what he wanted, someone to annoy him when he felt like crap. "Who is it?"

There were a couple thumps as the 'visitor' bounced their way into his room, then the side of the bed sank a bit as someone dropped onto it. "GOOD MORNING, RIVAL!"

Groaning aloud, the little prodigy pulled his pillow over his head. It just had to be _him_. "Get. Out."

Gai didn't leave, instead bouncing on the edge of the mattress as he waited for his friend to emerge. Headache already added to by the sudden yell, Kakashi gritted his teeth as his "friend" continued to shake the bed. The motion wasn't doing anything for his stomach either.

At last, unable to stand it any longer, he pulled his head from under the pillow, sitting up to glare at the other boy. "Would you knock it off?"

Grinning widely, Gai kept up his steady bounce. "Someone's grouchy this morning! What's the matter, Kakashi, wake up on the wrong side of the bed?"

"No, I woke up over the freaking toilet, now cut it out!"

"Language," Sakumo warned from the doorway. "I know you're not feeling well, but try to be a little accomodating, okay?" Closing the door, he left.

Slouching back against the pillows, Kakashi scowled at the wall. "Sorry," he mumbled. "What are you doing here, anyway?"

Gai adopted a hurt expression, finally sitting still. "Should I not come and visit my rival when he's lying on his deathbed?"

"I'm not dying, Gai, I just have a really bad cold," was the straight-faced reply. "You might not want to stay too long - I don't want to get you sick."

"Not to worry! I came prepared!" Producing a surgical mask from . . . somewhere (Kakashi didn't want to know where Gai kept things in a pocketless training suit), he fit it over his nose and mouth, smiling widely behind the fabric. "See? I'm completely protected!"

"If you say so."

"And I brought something for you too!" Again, something magically appeared in Gai's hand - this time, it was a book with a bright orange cover, a laughing man and woman on the front. "I stole this from my dad," the dark-haired boy whispered. "He keeps it hidden in his closet so Mom doesn't see it, but I found it last week."

Curious, Kakashi tilted his head to one side, reading the title aloud. "'_Icha Icha Paradise?_'"

Gai nodded, smiling slyly. "It's one of those 'adult' books. Wanna take a look?"

Both boys stretched out on their stomachs, the book between them. For the rest of the day, little giggles could be heard from the other side of the door. Once, in passing, Sakumo smiled when he heard Kakashi suddenly burst out laughing. It was good that his son had a friend to cheer him up now and then.


	30. Teamwork

**Thirty - Teamwork - Team Gai**

She sat across the small table from the bearded man, the leader of the largest gang in the city. Tenten could practically smell the sweat and sake on him; she fought the urge to wrinkle her nose. Her job was to keep him busy here, inside the bar, until Neji, Lee, and Gai-sensei arrived to help take him down.

"Y'should know," the man drawled, "I've had you watched since you came in here. I watch _all_ the pretty ones." Tenten nearly shuddered before fixing a falsely pleasant smile on her face, noting the alcohol-slurred tone of his voice.

"Is that right? I'm flattered, really."

"You shouldn' be," he said, standing. "I don' like girly ninja try'na mess with me, unnerstan'?"

_Crap_. Getting to her feet, Tenten affected an air of cold indifference. "Please. Why would a girl like me be a ninja? I don't even -" A meaty hand reached out, catching onto her wrist, and dragging her along as the man headed for the bar's back exit.

"Shut up. Just shut up."

Once in the dark back alley, the gang leader - Yamidoro Daichi, to give him his full name - released her, pushing so that her back fetched up against the wall. He towered over her, glaring. "Who are you? Why were you following me tonight?"

The drunken slur was gone - an act then. Tenten kept her expression neutral, her voice cool as she said, "It's none of your business who I am. So what if I ended up in the same bar as you? Can't a girl go out and have a drink once in a while?"

_Smack!_

Her head whipped to the side as Yamidoro's palm connected with her cheek, a breath rushing out in a short, surprised 'huh!' Frozen for a moment, she slowly turned back . . . and began to laugh. The big man stared - what kind of girl was this?

"What do you know. You _are_ as stupid as you look."

Yamidoro didn't even have time to turn before the first blow landed, knocking him sideways and away from Tenten. Suddenly, there was a young man, long, dark hair flying as fast as his hands that seemed to pummel every inch of him that they could reach. Something about sixty-four palms . . . . Yamidoro doubled over at the final blow to his gut.

The long-haired kid was replaced by two others, both wearing green exercise suits and flak jackets. They were even faster, and dealt more painful blows, all the while yelling about how he'd "bruised their youthful flower."

At last, he lay on the ground, bruised and sore, staring up at Tenten as she stood over him. She was smirking in satisfaction, the long-haired boy's hand on her shoulder. She turned to him and nodded.

He and the younger green-clad attacker hauled him up, holding him against the wall of the bar, high enough that his feet dangled. Calmly, Tenten walked right up, and pinned him there, stabbing two kunai through his shirt fabric into cracks in the mortar.

Her smile had turned dangerous now. "Too bad you like to go drinking in your opposition's territory," she said sweetly.

Yamidoro made a 'tsch' sound. "At least I can take care of myself. You had to get your bullyboys to help you out. S'why girls shouldn't be ninja - they oughta be home taking care of the babies."

Tenten held out a hand as Neji made to step forward, holding her smile as she shook her head. "Thing is, Yamidoro, I wouldn't want to be without these guys in a fight, because they have my back if I need it." The smile became a grin. "You're all alone - who's got your back?"

Returning a protective hand to his teammate's shoulder, Neji spoke up. "You're lucky this is only a warning; leave the supply trains to Takami Village alone."

Without another word, the four man team turned and headed out of the alley, leaving Yamidoro Daichi to face his fate at the hands of whatever rival gang members happened by.


	31. Flowers

_A/N: A thank you goes out this time to my boyfriend, BrooklynRager. He's the one male Naruto fan that could answer the question "Do you think Shika is a boxers or briefs guy?" without looking at me like I'd grown another head. :)_

**Thirty-one - Flowers - Shikemari**

The desert. Of all the places in the world she could come from, she had to be from the desert. It wasn't even the heat that was a pain - it was the sand. It got everywhere - in his hair, his nose . . . in fact, Shikamaru was pretty sure there was sand in his briefs. Ugh - maximum discomfort.

"Hey - are you listening?" said a voice in front of him. Lifting his head off his arms - which were folded on the tabletop - he shrugged.

"Was I supposed to be?"

Temari rolled her eyes. "Your Hokage sent you out here to help the instructors at the Sand Ninja Academy adapt their curriculum to that of the Hidden Leaf Village - so start helping."

Giving a sigh of exasperation, Shikamaru forced himself to focus. She was right, he knew. And that's what bugged him. A girl that was almost as fast on her mental feet as he was, and a pretty good tactician too, not to mention the oldest kid of the Fourth Kazekage, and sister to the _current_ Kazekage. Talk about friends in high places.

"All right. What classes are you teaching?"

"I just have one - the junior kunoichi special classes." She frowned at the look of puzzlement he gave her. "What?"

"Kunoichi special classes?" Shikamaru repeated. "Don't those usually involved stuff like culture and flower-arranging?" At Temari's nod, he said, "Where are you going to get flowers in the desert?"

She arched one eyebrow - she was good at doing that, he'd noticed. "You really don't know much about the desert, do you," she said, eyeing him skeptically.

"It's big, it's hot, there's a lot of sand, and not much water."

Temari shook her head. "You're right on the first three, but only partially on the fourth. There is water - you just have to know how to find it."

"Whatever." Man, this liaison gig was really turning out to be a drag. "What does that have to do with kunoichi classes?"

"Think about it, genius," she said sardonically. "Plants need water to grow, and since that's tricky to come by in the desert, most plants here have adapted by storing it in themselves. Like the desert rose."

He gave her a serious look. "You've got one flower in the whole desert?"

She glared at him. "No, we don't." Getting to her feet, she started for the door. "Come on - I've got something to show you."

He followed her up several flights of stairs, all the while taking the time to remind himself just how troublesome women were. However, he didn't dare say it out loud. Especially in front of _her_. Finally, they emerged onto the building's roof . . . and into what looked like a jungle.

"This greenhouse was built specifically for growing medicinal plants," Temari said matter-of-factly. "However, we imported dozens of foreign flowers from all over for the kunoichi classes, just to let the girls get a feel for as many as possible." She flashed a smirk in Shikamaru's direction. "Not too bad for a big, hot, sandy, dry desert, is it."

"It's pretty impressive," he admitted, looking around. There were some plants he recognized from the forests around Konohagakure. Over in one corner were several large aquariums, crowded with different species of water-plants. Colour assailed him from every side. He looked up as Temari laughed quietly. "What's so funny?"

"Oh, just a foreign shinobi staring at a bunch of foreign flowers," she said, still smiling. "It's kind of cute, actually."

. . . . Troublesome . . . .


	32. Hair

**Thirty-two - Hair - Chojino**

He sat apart from the rest of the little camp, on a rock underneath a break in the forest canopy. It was a nice night to be sleeping outside . . . if you were sleeping. Chōji, however, could not.

Their team was just returning from a short mission to the Land of Waves, fortunate enough not to have a scratch between them. It was better that way, Chōji thought to himself. If one of them received an injury, it meant a lot of boring paperwork for Asuma-sensei. He wouldn't wish that on anyone.

However, just because the mission was over didn't mean they had to get careless. So here Chōji sat, two hours into his watch, just enjoying the nighttime sounds of the forest.

He turned as a new noise came from the direction of the camp - a noise that wasn't the snoring of either Asuma-sensei or Shikamaru. Ino was pushing her blanket aside, getting up.

"You can go back to sleep," Chōji said quietly as she joined him on the wide, flat rock. "It's not time to switch watches yet; you've still got an hour or so."

Pulling the tie from her hair, the blonde girl began re-doing her customary ponytail. "I wasn't sleeping anyway. Too many little noises."

He watched her in his peripheral vision as she tied her hair up again. Heaven forbid that he'd ever say it out loud, but he liked her hair, and even more so when it was down. It certainly looked a lot nicer than the spiky mass of reddish-brown that he sported.

Catching a glimpse of something dark in among the blonde, he held up a hand. "Hang on, you've got something . . . ." Reaching out, he carefully plucked the small twig from the strands that held it. "Sorry, were you saving this for later?"

She laughed a little. "Yeah, I was going to use that to start the fire when we made camp tomorrow night. I had to put it someplace where I wouldn't lose it." After their little giggle fit had subsided, she pulled a bit of hair over her shoulder, looking at it thoughtfully.

"I have to say, I kind of envy Sakura and Tenten - they're able to keep their hair from collecting stuff when they're camping out like this. But Hinata and I wear ours long all the time, so stuff gets stuck."

Chōji nodded, tugging at the forelock of hair sprouting over his forehead protector. "I know what you mean. Mom says my hair tracks in more dirt than my feet."

To his surprise, Ino reached over, fingering the end of a group of spiky strands. He sat completely still, practically frozen to the spot. What was she doing?

She stood, circling behind him on the rock, still touching his hair. "Hmm. Maybe there's a way to make it so you pick up less dirt, but still have the "Akimichi" look . . . ."

The next morning, Shikamaru woke up to find Chōji already awake, and staring at the flames of a small fire. Truth be told, he had to do a double-take before he realized it was Chōji.

"What happened to you?" he asked, moving up beside his friend. "You look . . . shorter, like that."

"Nothing."

"No, really. What happened?"

Reaching up, Chōji gingerly probed at the cornrows of red-brown hair lining his scalp. "Ino decided that my hair was picking up too many little sticks and stuff, so she . . . ." He trailed off, dropping his hand back to his side. He stayed quiet for a minute before snapping, "Would you quit laughing?"


End file.
